I'm actually a bit more engaged with this season than the past few, but I'm really in the same boat.
After Peyton retired, I came to realize that I no longer belonged to any NFL tribe. I couldn't find any compelling reason to root for any team or player over another.
My wife died, and after that so many sports we had enjoyed together immediately--and to my surprise, having been a fan for years before meeting her--lost meaning: golf, football, PBR, NASCAR, etc.
I came to a similar perspective: these things just aren't that important in life. They become special because of the people, not the competition. Nowdays, I can't imagine how I ever had time to watch so much sports!
The Vols are my only tribe now, football and basketball. But I prefer to watch the football on replay online (cut the cable and didn't replace it---300 channels of stuff that took my time but left me little in exchange for it).
My life ultimately (hopefully) means more than entertainment. And life is always slipping away. If I was sharing those games with some special person, they would certainly mean more. But I have x-years left to accomplish whatever of lasting importance or good I can. If I have to choose on a given Saturday, I will invest in the future rather than indulge the past.
As much fun as it is to be a Vols fan... I'm confident heaven has never heard uttered the words, "Wonder how the Vols did down there Saturday?"
Very well said, and appreciated.
I would only offer one amendment, and one correction.
The amendment: sometimes, a pastime (like being a Vol fan) can be a way of remembering and celebrating others. Like the people who gave you the fever. Or it can be a bittersweet way of staying connected to someone you've lost, by doing in memory of them what you did with them while they were here.,
Both of those apply to my relationship with my dad, who we lost about a year and a half ago. This is my second football season without him, and I find myself smiling thinking about what he would've said at a particular point, how happy he would have been at a certain outcome, how much we would have grinned at each other at various times during a game.
I'm still incredibly strongly tied to the Vols, and will be for life. Even after my mom and dad, the two people with whom I most closely identify Volunteer fandom, are both gone (thankfully, my mom still watches with me, every Saturday). I'll be cheering our lads on to the very last Saturday I'm drawing breath. And my memories of my parents will be right there beside me.
And the correction: there most definitely are folks up in heaven asking about the game. Heck, my old man is almost certainly watching from up there. He wouldn't miss it for all the clouds in the infinite sky.
If they never ask the specific question you mention, "how did those Vols do?" it's only because they have free cable and get to watch it live.
GO Vols!
