Recruiting forum off topic thread (merged)

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#5,754
#5,754
Dust10 said:
You moving to Knoxville as you previously discussed or sticking around Nashville?
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We will stay here for awhile. I'm going to let Jr get through HS plus I just got a promotion at work. Things are looking pretty good for me in Murfreesboro right now.
 
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#5,755
#5,755
jjay2518 said:
Stories like this have me really dreading buying a house in Murfreesboro next year. The real estate market through the whole mid state area is nuts right now.
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It's crazy. Ended up with 6 offers on my house. It was only on the market for 5 days and brought 20k more than any house in my neighborhood....ever.
 
#5,756
#5,756
volatil said:
It's crazy. Ended up with 6 offers on my house. It was only on the market for 5 days and brought 20k more than any house in my neighborhood....ever.
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So you're saying you're buying season tickets for a few of us this year? You know, some of your favorite VN posters? (as OGbabyavi slowly raises his hand) :)
 
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#5,757
#5,757
volatil said:
We will stay here for awhile. I'm going to let Jr get through HS plus I just got a promotion at work. Things are looking pretty good for me in Murfreesboro right now.
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volatil said:
It's crazy. Ended up with 6 offers on my house. It was only on the market for 5 days and brought 20k more than any house in my neighborhood....ever.
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Congrats on your current successes. Sounds like life is pretty blessed for you at this time!
 
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#5,758
#5,758
thadolphinman said:
Don't post a lot, but I wanted to add this to the discussion. I think a lot of these issues on college campuses stem from our countries unwillingness to confront drinking. Most kids grow up and don't understand alcohol, nor do they have the experience or seen individuals approach alcohol responsibly. So they get to college and start to drink and it takes them a good while to find their limits as well as to understand whats responsible and what's not. Couple that with the fact that Universities are so scared of lawsuits leads to them pushing kids farther and farther off campus to drink. It is in the unfamiliar scenarios and places that I feel most of these consent type scenarios happening.

I feel that if universities became wet campuses and the drinking age was lowered to 18, a lot of these problems might resolve themselves. Kids wouldn't be forced off campus to drink, and the ability to buy a drink individually rather than having to buy in bulk would hopefully lead to more responsible consumption.
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That's actually a great point. I've read some things that suggest if you control for alcohol consumption, these issues drop dramatically.
 
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#5,759
#5,759
MockingVol said:
I respect people that are able to follow through with this, but it was much easier to accomplish when this rule was created since people were married around 12-16 years of age.

The average person probably lost their virginity at an earlier age back then-- consummation of the marriage-- than now, but now the average person gets married at least a decade later than back then.
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Again, it comes down to your own personal choice. Easier or not, this is the times we live in now. We can not live in "what if's" as a society and say that "well if I were in a different position it would be different". Well....yeah, I'm sure it would be because the whole situation would be different. That again brings us back to not willing to take responsibility for our own actions.

Also, I'm not trying to sit here and be a moral policeman. I am a Christ follower and I have my own personal afflictions regarding the no sex thing before marriage and I am not about to force others to obey them. I'm just trying to prove my point that our society has allowed the deterioration of self-accountability and taking up for ones actions with the consequences that follow.
 
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#5,760
#5,760
MockingVol said:
I respect people that are able to follow through with this, but it was much easier to accomplish when this rule was created since people were married around 12-16 years of age.

The average person probably lost their virginity at an earlier age back then-- consummation of the marriage-- than now, but now the average person gets married at least a decade later than back then.
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zhangliao04 said:
Again, it comes down to your own personal choice. Easier or not, this is the times we live in now. We can not live in "what if's" as a society and say that "well if I were in a different position it would be different". Well....yeah, I'm sure it would be because the whole situation would be different. That again brings us back to not willing to take responsibility for our own actions.

Also, I'm not trying to sit here and be a moral policeman. I am a Christ follower and I have my own personal afflictions regarding the no sex thing before marriage and I am not about to force others to obey them. I'm just trying to prove my point that our society has allowed the deterioration of self-accountability and taking up for ones actions with the consequences that follow.
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I'll add this:

Whether or not you hold the conviction of abstaining until marriage or not (and, if you do, whether or not you are able to resist the temptation until you are married), certainly we can all agree that it would be a completely different situation if this was a girl that AJ dated exclusively and had serious intentions of marrying. If that was the case, Williams obviously would not have been welcome to participate in whatever took place, we would't even be talking about this, and we would have enjoyed watching AJ complete his senior season.

So, if you don't believe that it's reasonable to wait until you are married, certainly you could agree that it should still be a sacred act, one in which you engage only with a person that you are at least considering a serious, long-term relationship. This casual "hook-up" crap is to blame for a lot of these situations.
 
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#5,761
#5,761
MockingVol said:
I respect people that are able to follow through with this, but it was much easier to accomplish when this rule was created since people were married around 12-16 years of age.

The average person probably lost their virginity at an earlier age back then-- consummation of the marriage-- than now, but now the average person gets married at least a decade later than back then.
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Doesn't help that we're feeding our kids a hormone cocktail in every chicken nugget either. Kids physically mature faster now.
 
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#5,762
#5,762
volssam said:
At the risk of getting bashed for being "radical"/"backwards"/"unrealistic"/"a prude", and at the risk of being the instigator of a thread derail....

....perhaps if people followed God's Will of abstinence until marriage, many if not all of these rape/assault allegations would stop.
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I'll say one thing to this and leave it be.

If the rape is true, then they should simply buy the daughter from the father for silver just as Deuteronomy says to do. And yes, if New Testament is used so is Old testament, can't cherry pick morality.

See why using a 2000 year old book with rules based on cultural and social opinions of the time doesn't work today?
 
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#5,764
#5,764
orangeblood79 said:
Translation:

I'm about to throw gasoline to a small campfire and then walk away...
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Nah, If someone comes in and throws out something not intelligent around, and it gets ten times the likes as a logical post (such as the guy later who said drinking age should be lowered because studies show in countries that have 18 the rape/drinking problems get reduced) then it deserves to be called out.

It's terrifying that there are people who think bad things happen to people because they don't listen to a thousands year old book that has more nudity, incest, murder, and violence, than the most terrible NC-17 movie or smut book ever made.

Our problem is we live in a society where things like rape don't get treated seriously enough (see, FSU) and women are terrified to report it for fear of being ignored or ashamed. Our problem is not religious, its cultural and intellectual, and the longer we ignore it the longer its going to continue going on for.
 
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#5,767
#5,767
Dust10 said:
Congrats on your current successes. Sounds like life is pretty blessed for you at this time!
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Thank you. I hope no one takes my comments out of context. I was merely stating how great the housing market has become in Murfreesboro and in no way was I boasting. The housing market in this area is insane right now. Anyone selling a home would have results I posted.

I am very blessed and I know who I have to thank for that.
 
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#5,771
#5,771
Daloth said:
Nah, If someone comes in and throws out something not intelligent around, and it gets ten times the likes as a logical post (such as the guy later who said drinking age should be lowered because studies show in countries that have 18 the rape/drinking problems get reduced) then it deserves to be called out.

It's terrifying that there are people who think bad things happen to people because they don't listen to a thousands year old book that has more nudity, incest, murder, and violence, than the most terrible NC-17 movie or smut book ever made.

Our problem is we live in a society where things like rape don't get treated seriously enough (see, FSU) and women are terrified to report it for fear of being ignored or ashamed. Our problem is not religious, its cultural and intellectual, and the longer we ignore it the longer its going to continue going on for.
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.

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#5,773
#5,773
Longish post but I hope you don't mind. :)

daj2576 said:
From an academic standpoint, how does one prove that "a lot of rape" doesn't get reported? If the only way to track an event is by evidence that the event occurred, and reporting is that evidence, where do these numbers come from?
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Hospitals, police officers, crisis centers, support groups, anonymous surveys and so on are all data rich. For example, a girl comes into the hospital and has quite obviously been sexually assaulted/raped (you can tell this via examination - without getting too explicit there are notable differences to a woman's private parts that are tale-tell signs that differentiate consensual from nonconsensual sex, tearing and the like is also how we know minors have been abused) but in the girl's case she's 18 and privacy laws protect her.

She does not have to come forward even if everyone on the hospital ward knows something horrible happened. In some cases, even if she tells the nurse or physician that she was raped they can't reveal this or call without consent (they can take anonymous surveys about patients for studies though which can reveal these things).

Police officers and first responders who are first on the scene often hear what happened and can see it with their own eyes and she may spill her guts about what happened (that occurs a lot) BUT their hands are tied when a girl of 18 refuses to make a statement or turns around and says 'no it never happened' even when everyone looking at her knows something did. Crisis centers can also gather stats without revealing patient/client info. As can several other methods.

There's little gain in lying anonymously and if we have an issue there then we are screwed because TONS of our research on all kinds of topics comes from these methods but a good survey is built for a margin of error and has means of detecting frauds.

I'm asking because I am a law student and observer of the criminal justice system. I find this stuff terrifying yet fascinating.

At some point I had read one of these reports that suggested that most rapes/sex crimes on a college campus go unreported and the way that was determined (if memory serves) was with a survey that asked college girls something to the effect of "have you, or anyone you know, been a victim of rape or sexual assault" and "did you report it."
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Rapes and sexual assault in general go underreported everywhere but especially at college. Everyone knows by now you've got to have witnesses - someone groped you on the L-train will get reported but someone who did the same as you were passing through the hallway will likely just get a glare. Also, stranger rapists who take you down an alley or break into your house are more likely to get reported. On campus, everyone knows everyone and TBH women are still people pleasers (don't rock the boat types) at that point in their lives -- for some reason women tend to get much stronger as they age (that's just personal observation but for some reason between 60-80 women become bad@sses and of course for some that happens sooner).

Now consider that for a second. If I have been raped, and I have 20 friends who know I had been either by hearsay or by me telling them, that is 21 people who could answer that question yes for only one actual event. Even if that ratio is 4 to 1, it's still terribly inflated. I would just really like to know how these numbers are created.
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That's not how a good survey works. The question there would be 'have ever you known anyone who was raped?' and it would fall into it's own statistical category. But I'm oversimplifying as it would be more thorough than that and there are controls for such things.

I can say that the book "The System" discusses athlete sex crimes in some detail. Interestingly it cited a study that said of reported incidents on division 1 college campuses, 19% of these crimes were committed by 3% of the male population. That 3% are the male athletes. That is astounding.

Also the book referenced studies that showed athletes were far more likely to be indicted for that crime than the general population but also far less likely to be convicted. It's interesting, terrible, stuff.
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I haven't read this so I can't really comment on most of it let alone the stats but I'll put it on my general reading list.

I will say that with athletes being more likely to get convicted don't discount the racial aspect. Our criminal justice system is far more likely to convict you if you are poor and/or black and we know that many black athletes come from poverty. Considering a lot of these crimes happen at parties, remember, it's also easier to ID an athlete whose face is famous than a random fratboy. You may never have seen either in person but the athlete you've seen in the media and are familiar with how he looks. The fratboy you've never seen and maybe won't see again. Most campus rapes involve alcohol and that can make identification difficult.
 
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#5,774
#5,774
I don't care what your views on religion, abstinence, and culture are.

We all agree rape is bad.

Don't rape people.

Do you want false accusations to go away? Let's live in a society for a couple of decades where people don't rape other people. I guarantee accusations, true and otherwise, will drop.

How do we keep rape from happening? Well, I'm not 100% sure on that. But I do know it starts with us loving one another and embracing other genders/orientations/beliefs/ethnicities as equals and friends.

In conclusion... Don't rape people.
 
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