'89 Movie: Christmas Vacation Humor Thread

[allvol81]

Don't piss me off art

 

[Rock33]

Great thread ! Just got done with the "prep", I'm laughing my .......well you know.......at this thread.

 

[volfan4evr]

Too late for me to in last night, but my favorite........"Dad, did you bring the ax?"

 

[chad4930]

Audrey: Do you sleep with your brother? Do you know how sick and twisted that is?
Ellen: Well, I'm sleeping with your father. Don't be so dramatic.

I have nightmares about what he does in there by himself.

 

[ALLVOL24/7/365]

Great thread.

 

[Vols4us]

As is tradition for us, that movie begins after the last present is opened. Classic.

Among more than I can count;

Art: "What is it? A letter confirming your reservation at the nuthouse?"

 

[peerless989]

"obviously something had to break the window, hit the stereo"

"I don't know Margo"

 

[UT_Dutchman]

Clark, I'd like to try to fumigate this here chair, it's a good quality item. If you don't mind my askin', how much did she set you back?

 

[UT_Dutchman]

Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny ****ing Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of *******s this side of the nuthouse.

 

[UT_Dutchman]

Hey Gris! If you're not doing anything constructive, run into the living room and get my stogies!

 

[UT_Dutchman]

*I simply solved the problem. We needed a coffin... Er, a tree. There are no lots open on Christmas Eve. Lewis burned down my tree so I replaced it as best I could. Voilà.

 

[Souce]

Rusty is, in fact, still in the Navy.

 

[OGbabyaviVol]

Mele Kalikimaka!

Santey Clause! Oh!! You scared me. Uncle Clark, are you Santey Clause? No, I can't even afford to be his elf.

 

[TBrown33]

I'm drinking eggnog out of a Clark Griswold moose mug right now.

 

[Ulysees E. McGill]

Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny ****ing Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of *******s this side of the nuthouse.

That is my fav..along with the "holy shi#, where's the Tylenol" tirade.