Official Jon Gruden thread XL

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#4,751
#4,751
volfan1631 said:
DPQiydGW4AAMcD0.jpg:large


Is that a FFCA hat?
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looks like it..
same logo...

GRUDON
 
#4,755
#4,755
jakez4ut said:
don't know what you want me to say jp.

i've said what i've said. i want gruden. don't think it's going to happen. i take my "move on" and other comments to the other threads, as so many others have been instructed to do. if you want to bring them here, that's on you. i stand by it all. i've purposely kept them out of this thread.

if you want to call me a hypocrite, just do it. doesn't bother me. if he's hired, i'll be happy, and if he's not, you won't see me with a bunch of "i told you so's".

so...........what else you want me to do?
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Not sure why you are getting ****. You have been pretty respectful in here and I think that is all anyone really wants.
 
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#4,758
#4,758
Grand Vol said:
The Grude News, the morning edition. For those just joining us...



OX0yQ.gif






Well, there hasn't been much going on since the last update. Not really, kinda sorta if you connect the dots. A few people think the deal was signed and rumors will start popping out here in the next day or so, but nothing from the known and verified sources of info we've come to trust. But a whole lotta smoke going on and a whole lotta talking.



And speaking of smoke and whatnot, we had an unusual occurrence last evening. A figure stumbled out of the smoky haze yesterday and back into this thread. He looked vaguely familiar, yet was like a distant memory we hadn't thought of in some time. We questioned him and his claims of who he was were quickly adding up. And more posters were called in to vet him. And sure enough, the OG Escape Goat, one of the Founding Fathers of the Modern Night Shift © ® crew returned to our family here and jumped right back in where he left off in 2012.



Well, I hope he doesn't jump right back in where he left off. The place was a mess...which may or may not have been caused by the original Night Shifters. This new breed just can't throw down like the old crew as evidenced by the regular posting by Ruck, EG and Cooke last night. But I digress... and might even incriminate myself, so I'll just stop short. But you do need to help EG out in making him whole again by combining his profiles or something, Mister Poobah. He shouldn't be a newb or get questioned by those with join dates of a month prior. EG needs to be whole again, Freak.



Bubba popped back onto the internet world with a cryptic Tweet stating "Gruden to the Hill" however, wrote it in Runic letters. Interesting format that was discussed, but awesome regardless.



It was "get to know your Beaver" night last night in the Gruden threads. It got a little weird when someone asked about his socks, but his reply was pure panache as he answered it.



But he also stated a bunch of the names we've heard mentioned were basically placating Sexton to get his guys raises. Makes sense if other schools know UT is breaking out the big boy checkbook for a hire. However, really not fond of the names being tossed out as they are unworthy of the Power T brand. Like that Mullen character.



Talk turned to golf and we discovered Vfl2407 plays from the ladies tees. Not that we judge though since his skirt flies up and gives his drive one hell of a slice.



And Atlanta offered to host the First Official Gruden Thread Golf Tournament. And I'm 105% sure he has no idea what he's getting into with this crew... He said to make it for a good cause. I suggested making it for the "GV's home for morally corrupt college coeds in need of adult male guidance." He wasn't going for that though. Well, I thought it worthy.



Now, here's the interesting part some of you missed in your screaming teenage girl at a Backstreet Boys concert/paparazzi approach to seeing AV and Beaver. While you were screaming questions at them you knew were not going to be answered, some of you missed the calmness of the pair as they had, well, a regular discussion. Atlanta always said he would come back for the celebration. And if you didn't notice it, he was in a celebratory mood last night and had the mark of a man who knew things were done and coming to an end. Beaver was relaxed and a normal guy talking normal things. He's still worried about doxxing, but I think we're past that point.



Here's the thing folks, sit back, relax and learn to read between the lines. And don't harass them when they do come around. Be thankful for the info they bring when they really don't have to and bask in the sunlight of knowing a little more than the average bear in the wastelands of the remainder of the FF.



But last night was like old times. Thread was moving faster than BearCat going after a cupcake and it was like the 2012 Gruden threads. Except for missing Patti.



Knuck continues to be extremely confident on the Gruden front. I think he already has made his party plans along with OrangePill. Both say "deal is done."



Knuck also stated "tomorrow (which would be today) would be a roller coaster ride." Coasty already has his prescription meds ready to go and the rest of us need to follow suit. Don't get caught up in negativity!



But we did find out why Coasty wasn't posting yesterday. Apparently, he hasn't mastered typing out replies via his nose while strapped in a straitjacket like Ape has done. Give it time, Coasty, you'll pick up that trick before long.



Faceless's contest for the boob welcoming committee is currently underway. Your celebrity reporter (this guy) has formed a team to assist in the pre-screening of said applicants as well as attire of grass skirts in a VN version of a luau as the Mighty One enters the stadium for the first time. I have managed to secure the services of Athletic Director John Currie in assisting with the pre-screening. When asked for a comment, he gave this response:



currie_j9wj4u.jpg




Additionally, Hall of Fame coach Phil Fulmer has come up with a rating system of 1 to 5 stars for applicants. Here's a sneak peak of his first grade:



phillip-fulmer-5186fd3fc91f9985.jpg




Former Vol Quarterback and GOAT Peyton Manning was asked to weigh in on his thoughts on the competition so far. His reaction?



peyton-manning.jpg




Coach Fulmer asked to bring along longtime friend and Tennessee native former Coach Steve Spurrier for "technical advice" and to round our committee to five. However, he had to be removed and medical attention sought after the first two applicants. We caught up with Coach Spurrier after he was released from the hospital and his gaze was eerily the same as when he left.



Former-University-of-Florida-head-coach-Steve-Spurrier-watches-the-Florida-Gators-during-the-Orange-and-Blue-Debut-Florida-Gators-football-1280x852-1021x580.jpg




Competition is ongoing though with a selection panel of four.



In other news today, Volnation Security Services went on high alert as terrorist threats were made against the Grude 1 yacht as it set sail between the Bahamas and Mexico. Corporate Spokeswoman Wild @s a Mink stated "We received threats that Bammers were planning on trying to build a bigger yacht than the Grude 1 since they believe they have to have something better than everyone else. Rumblings were also heard among the fan base as a whole 'those Tennersee fans don't deserve good things that can make us look bad.' We have to take such threats seriously as we know they cannot be trusted with anyone else having something nice and we have put our security on alert for any misdeeds."



Volnation Department of Sneaky Stuff also stated that if they were building a craft to rival the Grude 1 that would be proportionate in size for head coach Nick Saban, it likely wouldn't be any larger than a regular Jon Boat.



From the entire Volnation News Team, I'm Grand Vol and you tell them I'm coming! And hell's coming with me!









(All information herein is specifically parody unless otherwise indicated by real posters or events)
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Well worth the wait


Boom worthy
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Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
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#4,761
#4,761
VFL-82-JP said:
Heh, I don't mean it as a trap. I figure he knows what he said 2 days ago. Just don't understand why he has such divergent viewpoints depending on which thread he's in.
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they're not divergent, i think i've been pretty honest, and adhered to the rules of this thread.

i'd just assume you say "thank you" and move on.
 
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