New Game

#352
#352
With all the returning starters we have this Fall, I think we will be better than a lot of people think.
 
#355
#355
(meanwhile, back at the local Sonic drive-in)



"Name THIS purty boy."

"OH MY GOD!"

"Hey! Where you runnin'? You some kind've fa... oh, hey honey, yeah, I'll take two with bacon and cheese but leave off the pickles, they give me the farts"

"Did you say extra pickles?"

"No, I said I'm extra fickle"

"What?"

"I'm kiddin' honey"

"You want what with honey?"

"No- all I want is.... you making fun of me?"

"Of course not. Why would I try to improve on God?"


 
#356
#356
"God that feels good"

"This little piggie went for S&M..."

"AHHH!..... man that's good."

"And this little piggie went for... umm.. S&M too?"

"OH CRAP YOU Bi... uhhh... uhhh..."

"And this little piggie went for....?"

"ARGH"

"For?"

"ARHH!!!!"

"For?"

"Okay Okay Okay OKAY!!! I Won't Vote Republican Anymore! Please Sweet Jesus I'll Never Do It Again!!!!

"Good boy."
 
#360
#360
Psychoanalysis was invented so people who invest in "Marsha the Inflatable Girlfriend" dolls don't have to feel so weird, relatively speaking.

Unless, of course, their therapist is named Marsha, which happens more than you'd think and pretty much explains how perfectly good people end up Republicans.
 
#361
#361
Republicans are one of the four parties in our system of government. The other three are Democrats, Independents, and Libertarians. Isn't that interesting?
 
#362
#362
Interesting: One of those words people use when their brain freezes in place of things like, "Gack!!", "Holy ****!", "C'mon honey, don't just lay there," or, "Of course I'm not going to screw you when you pass out, I'm a republican, and we only screw the weak & vulnerable to their face.
 
#365
#365
Football: a game involving a great deal of aggressive tension which women still mysteriously like less than men despite the additional fact that the name of the game pretty much describes in shorthand the favorite response of women everywhere to brutish males who increase their aggressive tension (i.e. Y Chromosone = Foot + balls).
 
#368
#368
everything in life that causes stress can be easily solved with an appropriate amount of high explosive.
 
#369
#369
"Explosive decompression"

"You're kidding."

"No, really- all you have to do is say 3 factual things in a row in front of W and his head will, literally, implode. Last week the winners of the National High School Science Fair showed up at the White House unexpectedly and W ended up crawling out into the rose garden bleeding out his ears."

"No wonder he wants to cut Education funding by 24% in the 2010 budget."

"Exactly. Some people think it's a shame we rank 24th internationally when it comes to Education. For W and fellow members of his party, keeping Americans stupid isn't just a matter of insuring their arguments sound smart, it's actually a matter of survival."

"You mean...."

"Yeah- Make too much sense in front of a Republican, and their heads just go splat... it's ugly."
 
#371
#371
First she tells me it's only 50 bucks, and then she said for the kind of stuff I needed, it's going to cost more.
 
#373
#373
Exercise your right of freedom of speech, but just remember if you say something stupid you will get called on it.
 
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