There was 2 guys driving down a hill. The one driving looked at the passenger and said "oh crap, the brakes went out". The passenger looked at the driver and said "it's okay, there's a stop sign at the bottom of the hill".
Two Bammers walking down the beach and a seagull flies over dropping a load right in one's eye. He says "can you get some toilet paper" the other says "why? the bird's probably a mile away by now"