Official Jon Gruden Thread XXV

[barrylee]

The Grude News, evening edition. For those just tuning in.

Brought to you by:

Nick Saban Motors. "I used to be a successful coach; until Gruden forced me into selling used cars...but I've got a deal for you!"

{cue to remove platform Saban is standing on for commercial}

The Waffle House. "Scattered, smothered, covered and chunked. And we ain't talking about our hash browns."

And

Red's Wholesale Brick Distributors. "Want to build something? We can help you brick by brick!"

Apologies for missing the updates. Got a little down, but I got a mix tape from Ape to cheer me up. Now, I've never heard the terms "STFU" and "GTFO" sung to Gregorian chants, but it moved me enough to post the updates again.

Jones was at the press conference today... <sigh> So much for the good news and all.

Beaver suggests calm and things were on track. Which prompted a shaved versus waxed beaver discussion. Which somehow morphed into a Game of Thrones/Dungeons and Dragons/World of Warcraft discussion. Which made it pretty easy to identify the nerds among us. (you know who you are)

Boro suggested the same. Said things were more or less on track.

DTO is gone. Got angry, took his ball and went home.

We have an interesting legal source. Laid out the whole contract thing and how it works. Seems to be very knowledgeable about the situation and broke it down into Barney terms most of us can understand.

As well as another poster that's been following internet stalking us which helped break things down as well. Welcome aboard, guys.

SergeantVol has started a campaign to be a Mod. Not sure that's news, but a little humor mixed in with everything helps the day go by. Oh wait... he was serious? My bad lol

Freak had to step in during Gruden XXIV. Folks were getting a bit grumpy. Hell, I'm grumpy, but I won't direct it at a specific poster.

Albert Haynesworth dropped a Twitter bomb that said Jones will be here the remainder of the season, but Gruden is the front runner to replace him.

Not long after Tweeting, he got beat up by a former cheer teammate of Cindy Gruden for speaking when he shouldn't.

In related news, the NSA has removed the words "Gruden, Grumor and Grude" from it's list of metadata collection. This was done in order to avoid having to hire 7,500 new analysts to sift through message board traffic and prevent the meltdown of their servers.

Freak decides new pool on yacht will be filled with water after Lynchburg levels kept dropping by 2.5 feet every night and 9 feet during game days. After draining, Doyle found nestled at the bottom of the pool with a content smile on his face.

Also, he had to cut Daniela Lopez Osorio as the new head lifeguard. In test trials, attempted male drownings were up 9,432%. Is considering Ryan Gosling and Ryan Reynolds as replacements and calling it R2. Sudden cries erupt of "I'm drowning!" as Volly, Faceless and DynaLo all claim to be in need of rescue at the same time and require mouth to mouth. Sara and SFD heard from the deck yelling "you go girl!" while sipping on little umbrella decorated fruity drinks and hurling dollar bills.

However, new lifeguards note the three are still not even in the pool yet. And that CPR generally does not include silly grins and wandering hands on the part of the victim.

From the entire Volnation News Team, I'm Grand Vol and I'll have a martini. Shaken, not stirred.





I never agree with u in the PF lol but u are very good at summarizing!!





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[VFL13]

So I have a serious question?? Is Jimmy Sexton the problem here? I was listening to Bomani Jones on espn radio and he was talking about how butch just signed Jimmy Sexton this year to be his agent. Does he have something to do with the hold up? Or with why butch is still here? Just doesn’t make sense to me. It’s like Butch Jones has the upper hand on our AD for some reason and explains why Currie looks so distraught on the sidelines.

Just another fan theory lol.

Gruden till it ain’t!!

 

[knucklehead_vol]

Hawkeyes 2

oh boy some rough nites

I think that was the start of my decline.

 

[EZE]

So what’s the Gruden meter running at? Trying to get a pulse.

Mine is at 1%, and just because I never say "never." I will believe it when I see it.

Many have stated it before and I agree. Currie is either:
1. An evil genius; or
2. An incompetent fool.

There is no middle ground.

 

['Boro-vol]

Hawkeyes

Aahh...yes.

 

[Bubba]

Okay, that makes complete sense. Like I said elsewhere, I'm not familiar enough with these terms to use them totally fluently.

I did a bit more reading in the last few minutes, and I am realizing the ways I was wrong.

Would it be proper to say that Peyton's fundraising is to accommodate a perceived value loss by another party to the deal (Academics?)?

Yep, that would be proper.

 

[knucklehead_vol]

So I have a serious question?? Is Jimmy Sexton the problem here? I was listening to Bomani Jones on espn radio and he was talking about how butch just signed Jimmy Sexton this year to be his agent. Does he have something to do with the hold up? Or with why butch is still here? Just doesn’t make sense to me. It’s like Butch Jones has the upper hand on our AD for some reason and explains why Currie looks so distraught on the sidelines.

Just another fan theory lol.

Gruden till it ain’t!!

No.

 

['Boro-vol]

So I have a serious question?? Is Jimmy Sexton the problem here? I was listening to Bomani Jones on espn radio and he was talking about how butch just signed Jimmy Sexton this year to be his agent. Does he have something to do with the hold up? Or with why butch is still here? Just doesn’t make sense to me. It’s like Butch Jones has the upper hand on our AD for some reason and explains why Currie looks so distraught on the sidelines.

Just another fan theory lol.

Gruden till it ain’t!!

Jimmy is never helpful.

 

[VOL 4 Life 83]

Gruden going all orange this evening.

Like this....

 

[patrick]

I think that was the start of my decline.

Definitely was the demise of a precious many brain cells!

 

[MaTaLa]

One good thing about Butch losing so often is that he seems a lot less cliche”ish” lately.

So we got that going for us.

He always sounds like a police report

 

[FleeceItOut]

No change. It ebbs during the midday and evening troll invasions....but it's holding steady.

This is not for the faint of heart, or weak of Constitution. Stamina is required. Do you have it?

We'll see.

I’d say yes because I’ve become apathetic.

I’m currently trying to decide between
A) Currie being in full control, executing his plan.
Or
B) Currie having no clue what he is doing or is going to do.

I don’t understand the need to have Butch Jones on the sidelines at this point. It only hurts everyone involved, the fans, the AD, and the coach.

Plus at this point I’m not sure that Butch at the helm is giving this team the best opportunity to win. I’m fully convinced that an interim could get this team bowl eligible and possibly win out by rallying the troops.

I have zero confidence that Butch can win any of the games remaining.

 

[Volsfaninva917]

So I have a serious question?? Is Jimmy Sexton the problem here? I was listening to Bomani Jones on espn radio and he was talking about how butch just signed Jimmy Sexton this year to be his agent. Does he have something to do with the hold up? Or with why butch is still here? Just doesn’t make sense to me. It’s like Butch Jones has the upper hand on our AD for some reason and explains why Currie looks so distraught on the sidelines.

Just another fan theory lol.

Gruden till it ain’t!!

Jimmy is going to do what's best for him and that means getting Butch his full buyout

 

[KB5252]

Like this....

Yep, on Monday Night Football....... Putting out "the vibe"!

 

[MaTaLa]

Jimmy is never helpful.

His clients disagree

 

[patrick]

Jimmy is never helpful.

Jimmy Sexton can kiss my a$$

 

[Poppa T]

All right boys and girls, you need to ramp it up. Souce, says enuff of the words you got to google.

 

[knucklehead_vol]

Jimmy is going to do what's best for him and that means getting Butch his full buyout

But it's not what is keeping him from being gone.

 

[HearForGrumors]

Yep, that would be proper.

In your opinion, is the deal Pareto efficient, or are there residual inefficiencies that need restructuring?

 

[Gtown RNG]

Used to frequent that place often.

I have a daughter that’s a sophomore and I am so envious of her and her friends going out. She is not a partier so is usually the DD but some day I’ll be able to share some of my fond memories of KTown. What was the name of the Cowboy Bar right of Papermill? Also remember seeing Garth Brooks at Worlds Fair sight for free. It was long before he was famous. What I wouldn’t give to want to be in Knoxville every weekend again. Maybe Currie will get off his azz and do something quick and give us all a reason. If anyone is interested go back to my first post ( I think earlier this week) and see the email I sent Currie and Davenport.

 

['Boro-vol]

His clients disagree

Very true....I was angling from the other side.

 

[patrick]

But it's not what is keeping him from being gone.

What is keeping Butch from being gone then?

The assertion that no other coach wants to be interim?

That is kind of sad if true!

 

[mbh422]

Animal Hour at Hawkeyes 2 ---- 3 for 1's.

Yikes!

Can't believe they changed that to Bonkers. Never the same!

Iveys that is. Sorry quoted wrong thread.

 

[FacelessArya]

Love the recap, Grand!

I think I speak for Volly and Dyna-lo that either Ryan is acceptable for the new lifeguard. (Baker can fill in when he’s on vacation &#128522

Maybe Daniela could take the weekend shift.

 

[ETennGal]

Let me try one better..effective this year. That's probably a stretch but we're all just guessing anyways

Just thinking here... what about PM becoming the face of the venture firm (LAF) for UT - to be able to raise funds for the academic side (to replace any funds perceived by that side to be lost in the coaching deal).