The Topic That Will Never Die

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#4,651
#4,651
:fworks: :fworks: Way to go man! Congrats...like watching someone give birth..
 
#4,652
#4,652
Originally posted by Orangewhiteblood@Apr 4, 2005 8:58 PM
:fworks: :fworks: Way to go man! Congrats...like watching someone give birth..
Click to expand...

Thanks.

I don't even know how to respond to that last part...
 
#4,658
#4,658
Originally posted by milohimself+Apr 4, 2005 11:59 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (milohimself @ Apr 4, 2005 11:59 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Orangewhiteblood@Apr 4, 2005 8:58 PM
:fworks:  :fworks: Way to go man&#33;  Congrats...like watching someone give birth..
Click to expand...

Thanks.

I don&#39;t even know how to respond to that last part... [/quote]
. . . . but I do. And, trust me, it is NOT always a beautiful sight.

For those without such experience, the "beauty of childbirth" involves:

Watching your offspring be pressed with vice-grip force through a hole that you once considered to be YOUR sacred tunnel of love, often necessitating the use of scissors to cut one of the most sensitive areas on the body or a vaccum suction so strong that it pulls the skull bones, blood, and skin of the head into a cone, which might persist for weeks (hence the need for "baby hats"). . . . which is followed only minutes later by a gush of blood clots and a mysterious sack of purple goo. . . .somewhere interspersed is usually the loss of bowel and bladder continence by your beloved wife, occasionally highlighting the erupting hemorrhoid caused by the pregnancy. . . .all while 4 or 5 medical personnel, 1 or 2 medical students, a couple of nurse trainees, and the janitor watch her curse you for doing this to her with language you didn&#39;t even know she could speak (hence the need for a "mute" button on the camcorder).

Sorry if I spoiled that for anybody.
 
#4,659
#4,659
Originally posted by kiddiedoc@Apr 5, 2005 3:25 PM
but I do. And, trust me, it is NOT always a beautiful sight.

For those without such experience, the "beauty of childbirth" involves:

Watching your offspring be pressed with vice-grip force through a hole that you once considered to be YOUR sacred tunnel of love, often necessitating the use of scissors to cut one of the most sensitive areas on the body or a vaccum suction so strong that it pulls the skull bones, blood, and skin of the head into a cone, which might persist for weeks (hence the need for "baby hats"). . . . which is followed only minutes later by a gush of blood clots and a mysterious sack of purple goo. . . .somewhere interspersed is usually the loss of bowel and bladder continence by your beloved wife, occasionally highlighting the erupting hemorrhoid caused by the pregnancy. . . .all while 4 or 5 medical personnel, 1 or 2 medical students, a couple of nurse trainees, and the janitor watch her curse you for doing this to her with language you didn&#39;t even know she could speak (hence the need for a "mute" button on the camcorder).

Sorry if I spoiled that for anybody.
Click to expand...

They should hire you to go talk to teens about pregnancy.....after hearing that, the girls will never want to do anything.....

 
#4,660
#4,660
yeah, my wife called me things I&#39;d never been called before and believe you me I&#39;d been called plenty of things before
 
#4,667
#4,667
Well, that just takes it&#33; What can I say at this point? Sure makes me glad, I guess, that I didn&#39;t witness the birth of any of my sons. Really sounds kinda gross.
 
#4,674
#4,674
Hey Freak , I was looking for the tazer post to share with all the newbies and can&#39;t find it can you help a brother out?
 
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