The Offical Make Fun Of Kentucky Thread

#77
#77
Demon_Vol said:
The Round Mound Of Touchdown, The BBQB (Big Beautiful Quarterback), The Pillsburry Throw Boy. His own team had so many fat jokes for him it's unreal.
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That guy was hilarious.

Singlehandedly took the corner blitz out of the opposing team's playbook. They just wrapped their arms around him and hung on while he drug them across the field.
 
#78
#78
Q: Why do they throw out a sack of manure at University of Kentucky weddings?
A: To keep the flies off the bride.

One day in an elementary school in Lexington, KY, a teacher asks her class if the Kentucky Wildcats are their favorite football team. The whole class says yes, except for Little Jimmy.
The teacher asks, "What's your favorite football team Jimmy?"
Little Jimmy says, "The Tennessee Volunteers"
The teacher asks, "Well, why is that?"
Little Jimmy says, "Well, my dad is a Vol fan, my mom is a Vol fan, I guess that makes me a Vol fan."
The teacher angered by his reply says, "If your dad was a moron and your mom was an idiot what would that make you?"
Little Jimmy says, "Well, I guess that would make me a Kentucky fan."

Q: Where was O.J. hiding right before the famous white Bronco chase?
A: On the University of Kentucky campus. That's the last place you would find a football player.

Q. What did the Kentucky graduate say to the Tennessee graduate?
A. "Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order, please?"

Q: What does the average University of Kentucky student get on his SAT?
A: Drool.
 
#79
#79
In case you are travelling to the game...

How do you know when you're staying in a Kentucky hotel?

When you call the front desk and say "I've gotta leak in my sink" and the person at the front desk says "Go ahead."


Better news, from "Dumb Kentucky Laws" and pertaining specifically to Lexington...

"By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground."
 
#80
#80
A University of Kentucky cheerleader holding a baby gets on a bus. The bus driver looks at them and says, “Damn, That's the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!”
In a huff the woman slams her money into the fare box and goes to the rear of the bus. The man seated next to her sees she’s agitated and asks what’s wrong.
“The bus driver insulted me!” she fumes.
“That’s outrageous!” says the man. “He’s a public servant and shouldn’t be insulting passengers.”
“You 're right!” the woman says. “I think I’ll go up there and give him a piece of my mind!”
“That’s a good idea,” says the man. “'I’ll hold your monkey.”
 
#81
#81
True story:
Being part Appalachian, Kentuckians are used to inbreeding jokes. However, there is one joke about Kentucky and inbreeding that's funny because it's true: The story of the Blue Fugates of Troublesome Creek. The Fugates were an extended family living in an isolated hollow in Eastern Kentucky ominously named Troublesome Creek. Most members of the family had "hereditary methemoglobinemia." This is an enzyme deficiency that causes a person's blood to run vein blue as opposed to arterial red. Instead of being pink, these people are tinted blue or purple. The condition is based on a recessive gene; the only way to acquire it is if both your parents pass down the love. So what were the odds of clan founder Martin Fugate taking another methemoglobinemia carrier as his wife? He did, and they settled in Troublesome Creek sometime in the mid 19th Century. Cousins marrying cousins was commonplace among isolated Appalachians, so by the time a doctor discovered the Fugates in the 1960s, there were several blue people living in the hills around Hazard.
 

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#82
#82
The only real question is will the Vols butt whip the Kats, or will the Kats manage to pull defeat from the jaws of victory and end up with another hard faught loss to add to the current 24 year nation leading streak. I am looking forward to the silver celebration Saturday night.
 
#87
#87
I hate Kentucky as much as the next guy....but let's give them some credit for atleast doing something right in the last 24 years....
 

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#88
#88
bigorange said:
True story:
Being part Appalachian, Kentuckians are used to inbreeding jokes. However, there is one joke about Kentucky and inbreeding that's funny because it's true: The story of the Blue Fugates of Troublesome Creek. The Fugates were an extended family living in an isolated hollow in Eastern Kentucky ominously named Troublesome Creek. Most members of the family had "hereditary methemoglobinemia." This is an enzyme deficiency that causes a person's blood to run vein blue as opposed to arterial red. Instead of being pink, these people are tinted blue or purple. The condition is based on a recessive gene; the only way to acquire it is if both your parents pass down the love. So what were the odds of clan founder Martin Fugate taking another methemoglobinemia carrier as his wife? He did, and they settled in Troublesome Creek sometime in the mid 19th Century. Cousins marrying cousins was commonplace among isolated Appalachians, so by the time a doctor discovered the Fugates in the 1960s, there were several blue people living in the hills around Hazard.
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I live in Appalachia, Kentucky. So I am used to hearing all the jokes like this. Though the stereo-type is very far-fetched, could this have played into the university's choice of blue as the school color?
 
#89
#89
Tennessee Golfer said:
just checking. he has to be related to the family in your story then. that's too big of a coincidence
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It definitely started with the Fugate family, but it didn't happen to all of them. Also, its seems as if there was no ill effects with the condition...you know, besides the whole being blue thing... :)

The condition seems to have died out when the family stopped procreating with each other.
 
#91
#91
24-show-goes-carbon-neutral.jpg
 
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