The Make Fun Of Virginia Tech Thread

#227
#227
Q. What did the Virginia Tech graduate say to the Virginia graduate?

A. "Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order, please?"

A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a good Virginia Tech joke?"

The guy next to him replies, "Well before you tell that joke, you should know something. I'm 6' tall, 200 lbs., and I am a Virginia Tech grad. The guy sitting next to me is 6' 2" tall, weighs 225, and he's a Virginia Tech grad. And the fella next to him is 6' 5" tall, weighs 250, and he's a Virginia Tech grad. Now, you still wanna tell that joke?"

The first guy says, "No, not if I'm gonna have to explain it three times."

Blacksburg News Report: Football practice in Blacksburg was delayed on Monday for nearly two hours. One of the offensive players, while on his way to the locker room, happened to look down and notice a suspicious looking, unknown, white powdery substance on the practice field. The head coach, Frank Beamer, immediately suspended practice while the FBI was called in to investigate. After a complete field analysis, the FBI determined that the white substance unknown to the players was the goal line. Practice was resumed when the FBI decided that the team would not be likely to encounter the substance again.

Two Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University fans were walking down the street when they came upon a dog lying on the sidewalk licking and cleaning his groin like dogs do.

The first Virginia Tech fan says to the second, "Boy, I wish I could do that."

The second Virginia Tech fan replies, "Yeah, me too. But I wouldn't try it."

The first Virginia Tech fan asks, "Why not?"

The second Virginia Tech fan replies, "Because I'm afraid the dog might bite me."


Q: Why don't Virginia Tech Hokies fans let their kids play in sand boxes?

A: Because cats keep covering them up.

Q: What do you call a Virginia Tech player with a championship ring?

A: A thief!


Q: What do Virginia Tech and pot have in common?

A: They both get smoked in bowls!

Did you hear about the Hokie fan who was so upset that the Cavaliers beat Virginia Tech that he tried to commit suicide by jumping out of his basement window?

It was reported that Virginia Tech head football coach Frank Beamer will only be dressing twenty players for the Virginia game. The rest of the players will have to get dressed by themselves

Q: What's the only sign of intelligent life in Blacksburg?

A: Charlottesville: 187 Miles


Q: Did you hear the story about the semi-truck carrying pigs that flipped over on the Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University campus?

A: The officials had to check ID's before letting any of the Hokies cheerleaders back on board.

General Schwarzkopf was walking through the desert during the Gulf War when he found a lamp on the ground. He picked it up, rubbed, and out came a genie.

The genie said to the General, "I will grant you one wish."

The General replied, "I wish that we will win this war. Here is a map of the desert and all the war parties. Please make us win the war."

The genie responded, "I'm not that powerful of a genie. I cannot grant you that wish."

"Well," the General responds, "then can you have Virginia Tech win a bowl game this year?"

The genie thinks for a moment, then says, "Let me see that map again."

Q: Did you hear about the power outage at the Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University library?

A: Forty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours.

One day in an elementary school in Blacksburg, VA, a teacher asks her class if the Virginia Tech Hokies are their favorite football team. The whole class says yes, except for Little Jimmy.

The teacher asks, "What's your favorite football team Jimmy?"

Little Jimmy says, "The Virginia Cavaliers "

The teacher asks, "Well, why is that?"

Little Jimmy says, "Well, my dad is a Cavalier fan, my mom is a Cavalier fan, I guess that makes me a Cavalier fan."

The teacher angered by his reply says, "If your dad was a moron and your mom was an idiot what would that make you?"

Little Jimmy says, "Well, I guess that would make me a Virginia Tech fan."
 
#228
#228
FlawlessVictory said:
virginia-tech-bikini.jpg
Click to expand...

"Girl" on the far left has a bulge in her shorts.
 
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#229
#229
governmentmule said:
Q. What did the Virginia Tech graduate say to the Virginia graduate?

A. "Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order, please?"

A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a good Virginia Tech joke?"

The guy next to him replies, "Well before you tell that joke, you should know something. I'm 6' tall, 200 lbs., and I am a Virginia Tech grad. The guy sitting next to me is 6' 2" tall, weighs 225, and he's a Virginia Tech grad. And the fella next to him is 6' 5" tall, weighs 250, and he's a Virginia Tech grad. Now, you still wanna tell that joke?"

The first guy says, "No, not if I'm gonna have to explain it three times."

Blacksburg News Report: Football practice in Blacksburg was delayed on Monday for nearly two hours. One of the offensive players, while on his way to the locker room, happened to look down and notice a suspicious looking, unknown, white powdery substance on the practice field. The head coach, Frank Beamer, immediately suspended practice while the FBI was called in to investigate. After a complete field analysis, the FBI determined that the white substance unknown to the players was the goal line. Practice was resumed when the FBI decided that the team would not be likely to encounter the substance again.

Two Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University fans were walking down the street when they came upon a dog lying on the sidewalk licking and cleaning his groin like dogs do.

The first Virginia Tech fan says to the second, "Boy, I wish I could do that."

The second Virginia Tech fan replies, "Yeah, me too. But I wouldn't try it."

The first Virginia Tech fan asks, "Why not?"

The second Virginia Tech fan replies, "Because I'm afraid the dog might bite me."


Q: Why don't Virginia Tech Hokies fans let their kids play in sand boxes?

A: Because cats keep covering them up.

Q: What do you call a Virginia Tech player with a championship ring?

A: A thief!


Q: What do Virginia Tech and pot have in common?

A: They both get smoked in bowls!

Did you hear about the Hokie fan who was so upset that the Cavaliers beat Virginia Tech that he tried to commit suicide by jumping out of his basement window?

It was reported that Virginia Tech head football coach Frank Beamer will only be dressing twenty players for the Virginia game. The rest of the players will have to get dressed by themselves

Q: What's the only sign of intelligent life in Blacksburg?

A: Charlottesville: 187 Miles


Q: Did you hear the story about the semi-truck carrying pigs that flipped over on the Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University campus?

A: The officials had to check ID's before letting any of the Hokies cheerleaders back on board.

General Schwarzkopf was walking through the desert during the Gulf War when he found a lamp on the ground. He picked it up, rubbed, and out came a genie.

The genie said to the General, "I will grant you one wish."

The General replied, "I wish that we will win this war. Here is a map of the desert and all the war parties. Please make us win the war."

The genie responded, "I'm not that powerful of a genie. I cannot grant you that wish."

"Well," the General responds, "then can you have Virginia Tech win a bowl game this year?"

The genie thinks for a moment, then says, "Let me see that map again."

Q: Did you hear about the power outage at the Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University library?

A: Forty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours.

One day in an elementary school in Blacksburg, VA, a teacher asks her class if the Virginia Tech Hokies are their favorite football team. The whole class says yes, except for Little Jimmy.

The teacher asks, "What's your favorite football team Jimmy?"

Little Jimmy says, "The Virginia Cavaliers "

The teacher asks, "Well, why is that?"

Little Jimmy says, "Well, my dad is a Cavalier fan, my mom is a Cavalier fan, I guess that makes me a Cavalier fan."

The teacher angered by his reply says, "If your dad was a moron and your mom was an idiot what would that make you?"

Little Jimmy says, "Well, I guess that would make me a Virginia Tech fan."
Click to expand...

Not bad, given the source is obviously Virginia fans. For supposedly being the best public school in the country, the University of Virginia has some of the least witty fans I've ever seen. Most Va Tech fans are walking jokes in and of themselves, yet all Virginia fans can come up to say to them is "S-A-T... S-A-T." I'm sure it was funny the first time to brag about their superior intellect compared to the students at the vocational school in Blacksburg, but I've been hearing that for a least a decade at every match up between the two. They need some new material, but I don't even think they have the desire to get it. Va Tech fans will push, yell, and spit on the Virginia fans, and the Virginia fans not only don't retaliate, but sit there and tolerate it. I guess their fans' mental and physical weaknesses must have trickled down to the football team in Charlottesville.

I'm not into sociology or anything, but if you are, going to a Va Tech/Virginia game would make an interesting study. The differences in the two fan bases are not subtle. Virginia students are comprised largely of a bunch of introverted geeks that leave the game once their buzz wears off so they can start studying for a test they have in four days, and Va Tech fans are comprised largely of country meth heads and suburban white kids from DC area that think they're Eminem.



Regardless of how boring their students are, I must give Virginia credit for the campus. One of the nicest college campuses, I've seen.
 
#232
#232
I'm originally from Roanoke but went to UT. Chokies despise UT. When I went back for summer vacations during college, I got ragged non stop about the Vols. I hate them strictly because of their fans. Blacksburg is full of herendous nerds who are arrogant about their team. Their football "traditions" are lame. Ask a VT fan about "Enter Sandman", the Lunch Pale, and playing the hokey pokey. Oh, and no exageration, when you enter the campus, you drive through a cow pasture.
 
#233
#233
utgrad8003 said:
I'm originally from Roanoke but went to UT. Chokies despise UT. When I went back for summer vacations during college, I got ragged non stop about the Vols. I hate them strictly because of their fans. Blacksburg is full of herendous nerds who are arrogant about their team. Their football "traditions" are lame. Ask a VT fan about "Enter Sandman", the Lunch Pale, and playing the hokey pokey. Oh, and no exageration, when you enter the campus, you drive through a cow pasture.
Click to expand...

This. I still haven't found a Tech fan to explain to me what the lunch box is all about.

And as for the hopping up and down to Metallica, that is not cool. If you have a high school diploma, you are too old to do that. And don't get me started on the age limit for doing the Hokey Pokey.
 
#234
#234
TNvol86 said:
This. I still haven't found a Tech fan to explain to me what the lunch box is all about.

And as for the hopping up and down to Metallica, that is not cool. If you have a high school diploma, you are too old to do that. And don't get me started on the age limit for doing the Hokey Pokey.
Click to expand...


USATODAY.com - Tapp carries lunch pail to work for Virginia Tech


At Virginia Tech, the hardest working player each week earns possession of the lunch pail. It's a badge of honor
 
#236
#236
utgrad8003 said:
I'm originally from Roanoke but went to UT. Chokies despise UT. When I went back for summer vacations during college, I got ragged non stop about the Vols. I hate them strictly because of their fans. Blacksburg is full of herendous nerds who are arrogant about their team. Their football "traditions" are lame. Ask a VT fan about "Enter Sandman", the Lunch Pale, and playing the hokey pokey. Oh, and no exageration, when you enter the campus, you drive through a cow pasture.
Click to expand...

Thanks for relaying this info - oh so true.
I got bashed pm from someone else on this forum who felt that me wanting more "make fun of VT pictures" (excluding a couple that were tacky - NUFF SAID!!!) was a bad thing - I should be more sensitive considering certains events that happend on their campus.
Well, certain events on their campus obviously hasn't affected the conduct and attitudes of the fans there regarding playing the VOLS.
There is a bad infestation of them up here in the moutains, and they have just SLAMMED our Team, Coaches, Fans, Mascots, Band & Campus since the rumour came out about the Chick Bowl. And not in a professional manner either!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Like you said above - it's the fans - they are a nasty pice of work.
Just becuase VT isn't in the SEC and not on our regular playing schedule doesn't mean that the are not allowed to hate us - and oh do they!
And, like I said before - if you go to the game in Gaglanta, you'll find out that they carry as much venom towards us as the Bama/FL/UGA crowd all rolled into one.

...............and their uniforms are pretty hideous too.
 
#238
#238
Out in the fields of Blacksburg,
an abandoned outhouse lies,
some call it Virginia Tech,
some others V-P-I.
 
#239
#239
I've grown up in VA and I'm surrounded by Tech Fans. This is my once in a lifetime chance to SHUT THEM UP! I really do think that for some reason, every year Tech is always overrated. Look at their schedule, look who they've beaten the last several games. I really think we stand a good chance against them, and I think we'll match up well. This will be a good test for Kiffin to see how he uses a month to draw up plays and prepare for a bowl game.
 
#243
#243
It's shocking how much of this conversation was about the lack of class and respect that Virginia Tech fans have.

It's ironic that this discussion happened in a thread devoted to making fun of your possible next opponent, which included making fun of the massacre on our campus along with picture of our coach who was burned as a child.

I definitely won't lump all of your fans in with the people who posted the "despicable" pics, etc. I just ask that you don't lump all VT fans together because of stories your uncle in SWVA told you.

We respect the SEC and we know the ACC is lucky if considered the third best conference.

Any fan who thinks the ACC is the best is delusional at best. Those are the fans that came along when Vick (1) came along.

I hope we have a great game with no injuries.

Go Hokies!
 
#244
#244
It shouldn't be too surprising that everyone on here that has been to Va Tech or spent any considerable time in SWVA came away with a negative impression. They are trashy rednecks. The only thing good that comes out of going to a game at Va Tech is that you come away even more appreciative of being a Volunteer, and everything we have at Tennessee.

Obviously though, not every Va Tech fan is bad. In fact, I'll go as far as saying that I've not met a bad older Tech fan. It's the younger ones that have issues. I'm hoping that its mostly the older ones that travel so that everyone can have a good time in Atlanta.
 
#245
#245
Hokie Hiatus said:
It's shocking how much of this conversation was about the lack of class and respect that Virginia Tech fans have.

It's ironic that this discussion happened in a thread devoted to making fun of your possible next opponent, which included making fun of the massacre on our campus along with picture of our coach who was burned as a child.

I definitely won't lump all of your fans in with the people who posted the "despicable" pics, etc. I just ask that you don't lump all VT fans together because of stories your uncle in SWVA told you.

We respect the SEC and we know the ACC is lucky if considered the third best conference.

Any fan who thinks the ACC is the best is delusional at best. Those are the fans that came along when Vick (1) came along.

I hope we have a great game with no injuries.

Go Hokies!
Click to expand...

I base my opinion on the conduct and comments of the VT vermin that I encounter everyday, and have to listen to their rude and nasty comments about UT.
Get off this forum and go crawl back in the hole you slimed out of.
 
#247
#247
Let's see, their mascot is a "turkey." Guess that's what they are a bunch of gobblers. Let's take the hatchet to them.

Let's eee three teams from the SEC recently beat three teams from the ACC:
Florida over Florida St.
Georgia upset Georgia Tech
South Carolina upset Clemson

Now does that make the ACC Championship game an also ran!
GO VOLS beat VPI-Hokie, hokie, hokie high!
 
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#249
#249
Hokie Hiatus said:
It's shocking how much of this conversation was about the lack of class and respect that Virginia Tech fans have.

It's ironic that this discussion happened in a thread devoted to making fun of your possible next opponent, which included making fun of the massacre on our campus along with picture of our coach who was burned as a child.

I definitely won't lump all of your fans in with the people who posted the "despicable" pics, etc. I just ask that you don't lump all VT fans together because of stories your uncle in SWVA told you.

We respect the SEC and we know the ACC is lucky if considered the sixth best conference.

Any fan who thinks the ACC is the best is delusional at best. Those are the fans that came along when Vick (1) came along.

I hope we have a great game with no injuries.

Go Hokies!
Click to expand...

fyp
 
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