The Answer Question game

#201
#201
Q: Given that all the rest of her features were gifts from heaven, what color eyes would surreal's ideal woman have, in order of preference?
(many thanks for the date with Penelope!!!)


A: On a snowboard, at a resort in Jackson Hole, spending someone else's money like there was no tomorrow!
 
#202
#202
Q. Where did Matt Leinart spend the past weekend and what was he up to?

A. On top of the Empire State Building in New York. (The viewing level...)
 
#203
#203
Q: What classic romantic location suddenly and permanently lost all its allure shortly after the military tested its "giant chocalaty ex-lax bar" anti-King Kong defense plan?


A: Both the squirrels until the chorus.
 
#204
#204
Q: During production of The Chipmunks latest album, an all star ensemble entitled "We Are The Animal World", it was discovered that what two critters couldn't carry a tune in an acorn shell? The problem was solved by asking them not to step up to the mic until this moment?


A: Because MemphisVol's mind simply works that way, and doggone it, we need a little more of that kind of thinking in this world!
 
#205
#205
Q. What is the explanation for the cerebral philantrophy provided by MV, especially at times when the matrixed explanation of an exciting, but controversial, topic or theme is in question?

A. 1, 423, 692
 
#206
#206
Q: Using the new International Chromosonal Registry, give the numerical location of the genes responsible for my ill-fated plan to repackage Twinkies as edible penis-warmers?




A: Yes, but it takes about 20 yards of nylon twine, a stick of butter, and written permission from the National Park Service.

 
#207
#207
Q:Is it possible for one to swing from Lady Liberty's Torch holding arm, into her left nostril?


A:Just where it has been for the past 60 years, underneath the North endzone goalpost at Neyland Stadium.
 
#208
#208
Q. Is it possible to set up a mating nest for West Coast tsetse flys in Yellowstone National Park?

A. Three barstools, a saxophone, and two drunk bammers.
 
#209
#209
((A-1: Just where it has been for the past 60 years, underneath the North endzone goalpost at Neyland Stadium.

A-2. Three barstools, a saxophone, and two drunk bammers.))

Q: Where is the current location of Bear Bryant's secret family crypt and what was he finally buried with?



A. One with your hand is worth two with a Bush.


 
#210
#210
Q. What is an extremely hard question to answer?

A. Somewhere in Memphis near a cab stand but not too far from the coliseum or the river.
 
#212
#212
Q: What will the first demon to welcome Gordon Liddy to Hell be holding?


A: A file... unfortunately it was the paper kind.
 
#213
#213
Q. What did the defense not want to hear the surprise witness say?

A. Three days a week for six months and then once every two weeks.
 
#214
#214
Q: What is the recommended medication load for those in court supervised detox from "antiFulmer thread" addiction?


A: A three day weekend is not nearly enough to take it all in, but there are worse things to die trying to do.
 
#216
#216
Q: Observing this phenomenon at a swim meet tends to make a guy wish he had taken up the 50meter freestyle in high school.



A: That, and 2.5 million dollars will get you thirty seconds in the SuperBowl.
 
#217
#217
Q: Why Madonna, a korean cloning expert, and the last surviving sperm sample of Walter Mitty was recently kidnapped by a group of confused ex-ad-execs with neo-nazi leanings.


A: "Because it was either useless nipples or clitorises, and, after watching us for awhile, God figured men had no shot at ever understanding the clit, but if he gave them nipples at least there was a chance they might figure them out in time if they had their own"
 
#218
#218
Q: Once again proving that mere mortals ought not pretend to understand the thinking of the almighty, what was Pat Robertson's thoughtful explanation of male breast syndrome?


A: Because making it out of peacock feathers was completely impractical!
 
#219
#219
Q. Why did Bear Bryant wear that boring herringbone hat everywhere he went?

A. Three weeks from next Monday at 3 a.m.
 
#221
#221
Q. What is the main dish for the Governor's Ball in Alabama?

A. Memphis, Nashville, or Knoxville at night.
 
#222
#222
Q:Name three cities in Tennessee whose skyline can't hold a candle to Chattanooga's?


A: In a brand new velveteen smoking jacket, with a woman of questionable morals on either arm and a cuban cigar hanging off one lip.
 
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