Smokey Let Us Down

#28
#28
You know I wrote an article about this early in the season. I think i have it somewhere. Yep here you go:

Stop the presses hold the phones. Ladies and gentleman I have just came straight from an important interview where I have learned the source of our problems over the past decade. And it is not the Current Head Football Coach at the University of Tennessee Knoxville. Nope it is deeper than that.
I was sitting on the back porch with my ol’ bluetick hound “Smokey” (no relation), and he told me something that just about made me choke it seemed so profound. We were sharing a plate of Alpo and a Light beer, well ok, HE was drinking the beer, I don’t touch the diet stuff. Anyway, he said Jim (thats what he calls me), “When are all of y’all gonna figure out who is causin’ this heartache in Knox-Vegas?” I said, you got my attention, go on. He said “There ain’t but one thing that can be blamed for this mediocrity……That darned dog Smokey IX!” I about spit out my dinner (Alpo’s awful coming up a second time). “Think about it,” he said “This all started in 2004 when that new pup came in. Them other dogs have fought bears, dern near died from heat exhaustion and had to go on injured reserve, but this one hasn’t done anything.” Wait a minute, didn’t he bite an Alabama player last year? “Nah, he snapped, but he couldn’t even get that right. He is soft I tell ya.”


The more I talked to my dog, the more it made sense. we have had problems since 2004. We have struggled. Smokey VIII was the winningest mascot in school history. You know, if we don’t end this season very strong, if he lets another dog come into his house and lay claim and mark HIS goalpost, I say we call for a resignation. And I think you know who I’m talking about. I’ll hang up and listen……..
 
#29
#29
Maybe we could get some coaching for Smokey from the guard dog that that bit the Auburn guy on the hand at the end of their game!!!!

Sad thing is they took the dog off the field right after....the DA trainers should have ralized....how close they were to the action...

Would love to see Smokey ...whizz on UGA!
 
#31
#31
I will say...there is something poetic about Smokey taking a crap on Michael Vick's field...
 
#37
#37
I'll give him a pass since it was 3 am when he posted . . . but this may be the most blatantly sarcastic thread in VN history.
 
#39
#39
:lol: I completely missed that. Put that post in the "should've just gone to bed" category.
 
#40
#40
I think the dog at the top is not the problem. We could prolly do with replacing a couple handlers.
 
#45
#45
I thought I joined the HeeHaw thread for a minute...(dang 'a lang lang)

Nice groaners TennNC :rock:
 
#50
#50
Besides Ole Roy.....think they were givin' him "chewwies" made of singed (KY) wildcat skins!!!!! N' bet it had som' "fightin' chickin'" feathers in there too!!

Gives my dog the s***'zzz every time!

:)
 
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