Rules of the Workplace Thread

#1
smowkee

smowkee

Maximum Vollage!
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#1
This is a forum for the Volnation to post what they find as unacceptable behaviour in the workplace and possible punishment for such offenses. I'll start it off with chewing and smacking on ice. Anyone doing this at their desk should be forced to put on head phones and listen to Britney Spears singing "Toxic", over and over for at least 2 hours.
 
#2
#2
some have heard the stories of my weird co workers, but putting your family on spearkerphone when you share office space with other people is completely unacceptable. not sure what the penalty should be, but a openhanded slap across the face works for me.
 
#4
#4
Coworkers who walk into your cubical and fart and then leave...oh wait
 
#6
#6
Heating leftover fish in the microwave.
Having a phone conversation loud enough to be heard outside the building.
Waiting at the time clock for that last minute to tick.
Not flushing.
 
#8
#8
singing to some bluegrass in an open mezzanine office....oh wait..we all do that!
 
#9
#9
superdave1984 said:
Heating leftover fish in the microwave.
Having a phone conversation loud enough to be heard outside the building.
Waiting at the time clock for that last minute to tick.
Not flushing.
Click to expand...

no being a toilet painter either.

don't wipe your boogers on the walls.
 
#11
#11
The Game playing A$$ squares who have there nose stuck so far up your bottom they think they know when it's time for you to go to the bath room 10 minute before you do. Your know the ones who think they know your personal business or their misrepresentation of it. Who revel in the purposeful infliction of emotion distress spreading their poison making your life a living hell.
 
#12
#12
orangeblooded2 said:
The Game playing A$$ squares who have there nose stuck so far up your bottom they think they know when it's time for you to go to the bath room 10 minute before you do. Your know the ones who think they know your personal business or their misrepresentation of it. Who revel in the purposeful infliction of emotion distress spreading their poison making your life a living hell.
Click to expand...

or the ones that think their most intimate personal business is everyones. leave that at the house please.
 
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#14
#14
all single/married without kids employees are given 5 "my kid is sick" days every year.

all non-smokers get to go home 1hr earlier everyday to make up for the smoke breaks they don't get
 
#15
#15
drinks left unfinshed and thrown away in the trash can. I clean our office and another for extra money on the weekend and that is the number one pet peeve I have. It costs me time and the company more money on trash bags.

For the love of God, pour it out in the sink and recycle!
 
#16
#16
utvolpj said:
all single/married without kids employees are given 5 "my kid is sick" days every year.

all non-smokers get to go home 1hr earlier everyday to make up for the smoke breaks they don't get
Click to expand...

I don't work with any smokers anymore, but that used to eat me up.
 
#17
#17
Also, if you eat at your desk, it's your problem, not mine. I clean the floors, take out the trash, do a little vacume work, and clean up the bathroom. If you turn your desk into a trough everyday at noon, your crumbs are your issue you bunch a sloppy sobs.
 
#18
#18
TXVOL07 said:
drinks left unfinshed and thrown away in the trash can. I clean our office and another for extra money on the weekend and that is the number one pet peeve I have. It costs me time and the company more money on trash bags.

For the love of God, pour it out in the sink and recycle!
Click to expand...

you'd be cleaning out cups of dip spit at my office
 
#19
#19
utvolpj said:
all single/married without kids employees are given 5 "my kid is sick" days every year.

all non-smokers get to go home 1hr earlier everyday to make up for the smoke breaks they don't get
Click to expand...

IPorange said:
I don't work with any smokers anymore, but that used to eat me up.
Click to expand...

maybe someone should pick up the habit....except yall should smoke fat cigars....that would show em'
 
#20
#20
thats where youre wrong 1fn. I'd be leaving them in there. I go through my copenhagen fairly regularly here at my office, but I tend to it and my spitters afterwards. I left a note to a guy at the other office I clean telling him, "If I can do it, so can you. Im not taking this out if you continue to leave it in there. Find a toliet!"
 
#21
#21
Pizzin in the coffee pot.

My uncle worked with him, I played softball 1 year with him. He was a Dbag for sure.

His co-workers were always taking parts of his lunch. He started whizzing in the coffee pot. After a while they finally installed a hidden camera. Got busted and did some time for it.

http://www.snopes.com/horrors/food/piss.asp
 
#22
#22
volger said:
Pizzin in the coffee pot.

My uncle worked with him, I played softball 1 year with him. He was a Dbag for sure.

His co-workers were always taking parts of his lunch. He started whizzing in the coffee pot. After a while they finally installed a hidden camera. Got busted and did some time for it.

snopes.com: Urine in Coffee Pot
Click to expand...

Sorry but I have to ask, did your uncle drink coffee?
 
#23
#23
orangeblooded2 said:
The Game playing A$$ squares who have there nose stuck so far up your bottom they think they know when it's time for you to go to the bath room 10 minute before you do. Your know the ones who think they know your personal business or their misrepresentation of it. Who revel in the purposeful infliction of emotion distress spreading their poison making your life a living hell.
Click to expand...

Dude! You need to change work places now!
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