Official Jon Gruden Thread 35

Status
Not open for further replies.
#5,231
#5,231
Grand Vol said:
The Grude News, addditional breaking news this morning. For those just joining us...

OX0yQ.gif


We're a bit gloomy this morning, so I'll whip up something slightly lighthearted for those tuning in. Do not despair folks, we're getting there. But, in other news...

Volnation Enterprises and Freak specifically have called off the text to voice actors and released them from their contracts since the cage matches were getting fairly violent including the Cinderella story Betty White making it to the Sweet 16 before finding out she had been using brass knuckles and spiking the pre-bout drinks with Visine drops in their Gatorade.

Instead, he'll be introducing intro songs for each poster as they post. Several songs have already been picked out for various posters such as:

Insomnia by Faithless for FiveFingerVolPunch

I'm so excited by the Pointer Sisters for SmokeyHuntsGators

Tubthumping by Chumbawamba for Coasty

Ape's intro will be anything by the band Rammstein since, much like his posts, nobody understands the lyrics anyway, but it's good music

I can't wait by Nu Shooz was nominated as SFD's official song

Power T Rev's posts will be proceeded by BB King's Get out of here

Dudley's intro song will be Can't make up my mind by The Shining

Beaver's posts will be started with The Final Countdown by Europe

Freak's (obvious) intro song will be Return of the Mack by Mark Morrison...

And we have to listen to the whole song and the entire VN forum is put on hold because, well, Freak.

Any time Volly and I are talking and a hater of ours tries to interrupt, The System's Don't disturb this groove will automatically play regardless of his theme music.

All troll posts will be sought out by an AI web machine that will automatically replace the text with a picture of dancing Daniela. However, please don't make troll posts just to get that reaction as Freak will revoke it and replace it with a half nekkid dancing dude...on second thought, that has the potential for disaster as well as I just saw DynaLo and Wild @s a Mink perk up. Anyway, there are some exceptions to this rule:

Any time the word "Mullen" is mentioned, the scene "what's the most annoying sound in the world" from "Dumb and Dumber" will play and the text will automatically be replaced with a picture of Harry Dunne and Lloyd Christmas.

Any time Catbone posts, regardless of where in the entire forum, his posts will automatically be replaced by the "Price is Right" losing horn and a picture of a mule.

When it was pointed out sometimes posts come almost right on top of each other, Volnation Enterprises Science Division spokesman said "we're working on modifying the code that will allow for at least 10 seconds of lapse each time something new is posted so each reader can hear who is posting." When it was also pointed out it might take someone days to read each thread since they last logged on as well as the technical problems of having multiple tabs open, scientists noted "we didn't say it wasn't without snags. We're working on it and should have an answer...soon."

From the entire Volnation News Team, I'm Grand Vol and yo Adrian! I did it!




(All information herein is specifically parody unless otherwise indicated by real posters or events)
Click to expand...

GV's theme song is by the Black Eyed Peas.....Just Can't Get Enough

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OrTyD7rjBpw[/youtube]
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1 person
#5,236
#5,236
My introductory song for JG is Michael Schenker/UFO- Doctor Doctor. Guitar riff will have him playing air guitar as he comes out of the T.
 
#5,237
#5,237
Honestly I hope Gruden has taken the job. If he hasn’t and doesn’t plan to, he needs to say so. I will not be a Gruden fan if after this, he decides not to and wasted all this time when we could of aimed for Kelly.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1 person
#5,238
#5,238
jamesthesame said:
You need to check the status of the insiders on Volnation. Some of the same ones saying it was a done deal in 2012 are saying the same thing now.

I would put more stock in Hubbs than anyone here. That's just me. Out of this whole ordeal, Jimmy Hyams has been the only person with accurate news.

He kept telling us Butch wouldn't be fired when our insiders said he would. Then, Hyams said next loss Butch is out. Sure enough, he lost Missouri and got fired.

Just don't turn into Fox Mulder with our conspiracy insiders. :)
Click to expand...

Hargis > Hubbs
 
  • Like
Reactions: 4 people
#5,243
#5,243
rgvol said:
I don't want to believe they are trolling but am starting to .
Click to expand...

My "source" has not given me a bullet list of things that are going on, or made wild claims or any predictions about future events. He gave me exactly one piece of information, but he is absolutely in the exact position to give me that one piece of information. That piece convinces me that Gruden was done 2 days ago.

As always, TIFWIW.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 27 people
#5,244
#5,244
Jacaznob said:
Shew. I haven't heard about gridscape in a good while. My dad was a pretty active user back in the day. Orangello if I remember correctly.
Click to expand...

I was there with Grid (Chuck), RobtNAtl, Vol12, Lil Flower, Bivins, Holyland Vol, Profiler, Jumpmaster, and many others. Many of us met at several games, including in Tuscaloosa in I believe '99 or '00, and the NC game in Tempe. RobtNAtl went to the Grand Canyon with my wife and me. He was the best poster on any Vol message board ever--no one else even came close. I miss him.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1 person
#5,245
#5,245
YouTubeVol said:
Wow, that is a blast from the past. Lots of fun on the Gridscape site and getting to know some in person. Chuck was a great guy.
Click to expand...

Yes, Chuck ran a great site. Paid for it out of his own pocket! I sent him donations from time to time, in appreciation. I even got a Christmas card from him!
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1 person
#5,247
#5,247
UTK said:
Honestly I hope Gruden has taken the job. If he hasn’t and doesn’t plan to, he needs to say so. I will not be a Gruden fan if after this, he decides not to and wasted all this time when we could of aimed for Kelly.
Click to expand...

Anything of this magnitude is going to take time. There’s a lot to consider and a ton of moving parts.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1 person
#5,248
#5,248
UTK said:
Honestly I hope Gruden has taken the job. If he hasn’t and doesn’t plan to, he needs to say so. I will not be a Gruden fan if after this, he decides not to and wasted all this time when we could of aimed for Kelly.
Click to expand...

Wheeler Walker Jr has a song for just such an occasion.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 3 people
#5,249
#5,249
SDV said:
Agree. We lose to LSU and they announce Monday. We win they’ll wait until after Vandy
Click to expand...

My opinion: Regardless, we announce 11/19 or 11/20.

Lose to LSU, Press Release followed by Announcement same day

Beat LSU, Press Release 11/19 or 11/20. Formal introduction/press conference 11/26 or 11/27.

IMO JMO BBQ
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1 person
New Posts

Status
Not open for further replies.
Advertisement



Back
Top