My Take on Last Week

#1

ArkieVol

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#1
Here are my feelings after last week’s events.

As many of you know, I grew up a Memphis State Tiger. Dad went to school there, and started taking me to games at an early age. I was the kid that put oranges in the urinals at Liberty Bowl Memorial Stadium with a sign that read “Piss on the Big Orange” when UT came to town. My passion for football started at a young age, and for that, I thank my dad. Dad is still a Tiger supporter, and I have tickets to Memphis just to get to take Dad to a few games a year. As big of a UT fan I am now, it is hard to believe, but I even choose going to Tiger games with Dad sometimes, over making the trip east on I-40. Dad is in his 60’s now, and I know I won’t always be able to make that decision. But I would make them for the next 40 years if able to.

What started as a high school romance (and boy was it fun) a girlfriend I once had graduated from high school and enrolled at UT. On a weekend visit back in 96, I went to my first game, and I was hooked. Been a huge Vol fan ever since. The very first game I went to as a vol fan after that was in Memphis that year, and we all know what happened to the Vols then. Dad still gives me grieve over that.

I went on to marry a wonderful, charming, caring, beautiful PIG FROM FAYETTEVILLE. Hey, everyone has a few bad traits. She once had hatred for UT, and with a little help from God, I have changed that. I even have her wearing orange when we go to games. The ONLY exception for that is when UT plays Arkie. We have been together a little over 9 years now, and we have never missed a UT/UA football game. The Craftique license plates that say House Divided really rings true in my house during this week on the years the two play each other.

Well, last week was no different. Look guys, I take my football serious. I refuse to have “relations” to a pig, much less during Arkansas week. Heck, I won’t even sleep in the same bed. It pains me to stay civil and even speak when passing in the hall. It takes everything ounce of restrain that I can muster just to keep from throwing all her red $hit out in the yard during the Arkansas week. I want to slash the tires on her car when I see the hog on the front and back, and that’s even with me having the payment book. During this week, I can go so far as to say, I Hate My Wife.

So, this year, my 19 year old sister-in-law, who happens to be a freshman at Fayetteville, wants to go to the game with us. So I give in, and take off with not one, but two f’in pigs in my truck on the way to God’s Country. All I hear from the back seat on the way is “God, look at all the orange.” Every time with her being corrected from my wife, with a “just wait until we get to Knoxville” “Have you ever seen an Orange McDonald’s?”

Now you must remember that I had to sit through the debacle last year when we got clobbered. And knowing that they have what should be the best backfield in the county, I had to keep my mouth shut most of the trip. Well, the trip up there, that is.

To make a long story short, this week has been great. I am now sleeping in my bed, snuggled ext to my wonderful bride (the reason it has taken 4 days to get this posted) and enjoying a wonderful life.

My sister-in-law was in complete shock when she witnessed the sites of the Vol Walk, Salute to the hill, the band playing the Arkansas fight song, and the Vols running through the T. But the real amazement to her was you. You being 104,000 of my closest friends that were in attendance for another playing of our beloved Vols. All she kept saying was that she thought 78,000 was huge when RRS has a sell out in Fayetteville.

Well, friend, here is to another year or so, since I don’t think the two will play next year, of continued happiness. As long as I don’t act up, I should be able to share that bed with my lovely wife. That is until the next Arkansas game, in which I will refuse to sleep with the worthless PIG!

Go Vols!
 
#5
#5
y'know, if I was married to Ashley Judd, I don't think I'm enough of a Vol to cut her off during Kentucky week
 
#12
#12
Well, last week was no different. Look guys, I take my football serious. I refuse to have “relations” to a pig, much less during Arkansas week. Heck, I won’t even sleep in the same bed. It pains me to stay civil and even speak when passing in the hall. It takes everything ounce of restrain that I can muster just to keep from throwing all her red $hit out in the yard during the Arkansas week. I want to slash the tires on her car when I see the hog on the front and back, and that’s even with me having the payment book. During this week, I can go so far as to say, I Hate My Wife.

:lolabove::lolabove::lolabove::lolabove::lolabove:
 
#20
#20
My wife and I like different teams .. she is a ND fan.. I am glad ND and UT rarely play each other. Neither of us take things that far though.
 
#21
#21
My wife doesn't like sports. Either that's good for me cause I have no competition or it's bad because.... well after reading this thread I guess it's just good.
 
#25
#25
Got any naked photos of the 19 yr old sister in law?

Wanna buy some?


This is what football is all about. Not kissing your boyfriend safety on the sidelines, crying after a loss with your coach, running up the score when the game is over, or trolling on other teams websites. Don't go away mad, just go away. :clapping:
 
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