I’m old.

#12
#12
Ah, to be 50 again!
funny-officially-older-than-dirt-birthday-tshirt-novelty-noirty-designs.jpg
 
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#14
#14
I rocked my 50s. I did multi-point sixteen-way skydives. I rode RAGBRAI and from Koblenz to Amsterdam on bicycle. I did major landscaping, home remodeling, and split wood with a sledge and wedges. I traveled across this great nation and internationally. I attended bowl games, fished lakes, rivers, estuaries, and off-shore, rode horses on mountain trails, hosted and attended epic parties, helped neighbors and strangers, and donated gallons of blood. I changed jobs, increased my income, and persevered when my wife was pink slipped in a reorg after 23 years wth her former employer. Best of all, my grandchildren were born and have loved me since before they could talk.

Partake heartily of life this coming decade, Slice. Sup from the table with both hands. Make more memories.
 
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#17
#17
Let us come together to fondly remember the day Slice was expelled from his mother's uterus. Congratulations.

50 is the new 30. Unless you are a laborer; and 50 is the new 75. Vol fans also have to factor in the emotional toll of the last 15 years which adds 1.2 to your age. But you also have to take into account the beneficial effects of good diet, exercise, an optimistic attitude, and frequent sexual activity with your spouse, which can drastically reduce your effective age compared to your actual. Since you do very little of the beneficial stuff, it is safe to add another 20 or 30 years.

Happy [(50 x 50% laborer effect) + (75 X 1.2 Vol fan tax) + 25 (lack of beneficial stuff)] = 115th Birthday, Slice.
 
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#18
#18
McDad said:
Let us come together to fondly remember the day Slice was expelled from his mother's uterus. Congratulations.

50 is the new 30. Unless you are a laborer; and 50 is the new 75. Vol fans also have to factor in the emotional toll of the last 15 years which adds 1.2 to your age. But you also have to take into account the beneficial effects of good diet, exercise, an optimistic attitude, and frequent sexual activity with your spouse, which can drastically reduce your effective age compared to your actual. Since you do very little of the beneficial stuff, it is safe to add another 20 or 30 years.

Happy [(50 x 50% laborer effect) + (75 X 1.2 Vol fan tax) + 25 (lack of beneficial stuff)] = 115th Birthday, Slice.
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Lol
 
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