Happy Square Root Day 03/03/09

#7
#7
To really out myself as a math nerd, I have a bust of Pythagoras on a bookshelf in my bedroom. I bought it at a Greekfest in Knoxville several years ago.
 
#8
#8
vader said:
To really out myself as a math nerd, I have a bust of Pythagoras on a bookshelf in my bedroom. I bought it at a Greekfest in Knoxville several years ago.
Click to expand...

Dude. I was just kidding about him. I know for a fact that he was a riot.
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#12
#12
:)
A father who was raised out in a remote part of the country never had the chance to get an education past the 5th grade. He worked hard all his life and was a little skeptical of sending his son to school. But to abide with the state laws, he sent his son to school. The son came home and the father asked the son, "Boy, what be you learn in school today?"
The son replied, "I learnt me some geometry."
The father said, "What you learnin' in geometry?"
The son said, "Pi R squared."
The father replied, "Boy, them city folk teachin' you all wrong! It ain't pi R squared! Pie are round, cornbread are square."
 

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#13
#13
Two engineers decided to rent a hot air balloon and tour the countryside. Their balloon got too high and they got caught in a strong wind that sent them several miles off course. Eventually, they got their balloon closer to the ground. They saw a man walking around by himself and they yelled to him, "Hey, where are we!" The man looked up at the balloon, looked down at his shoes, scratched his head, looked back at the balloon, looked down at his shoes, then yelled back, "You're in a hot air balloon!" The more senior engineer looked to the junior engineer and said, "That fellow is obviously a mathematician." "How do you know that?" inquired the junior engineer. The senior engineer replied, "Because he had to think about the question a long time, he was absolutely correct, and his answer did us absolutely no good whatsoever."

A mathematician, a biologist, and a physicist were sitting outside their house one day which sat directly across the street from a vacant house. They then saw a couple enter the house. After about an hour, they saw three people leave. They found that to be most peculiar and pondered over what might have happened. The biologist said they obviously reproduced, hence producing the third person. The physicist said their data was clearly incorrect and they must have counted incorrectly. The mathematician thought about it, looked down at his shoes, scratched his head, and replied, "Whatever the case, if one more person goes back into the house, it will be empty again."

How do you tell the difference between an extroverted and an introverted mathematician?
The extroverted mathematician looks at YOUR shoes.

A mathematician is a machine that transforms caffeine into theorems.

Math and alcohol don't mix. Don't drink and derive.

A mathematician was walking through the woods one day and he heard a beautiful voice, "Greetings kind sir." He looked around and saw nothing. When he glanced back down at his shoes he saw a frog. The frog said, "I'm not really a frog. I'm actually a beautiful young princess. An evil witch cast a spell upon me to change me into a frog but if you kiss me, I'll change back into a beautiful princess and I will make mad, passionate love to you." The mathematician looked around, looked down at the frog, looked at his shoes, then picked up the frog, threw it in his bag, and walked off with it. The frog yelled out from the bag, "Hey! Didn't you hear me? I said if you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess and make mad, passionate love to you!" The mathematician yelled to the frog, "I'm a mathematician. I don't care about girls or sex. But a talking frog I can use."
 

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#14
#14
e_thug_tshirt-p235800879492367457t53h_400.jpg
 
#18
#18
volmanbill said:
:)
A father who was raised out in a remote part of the country never had the chance to get an education past the 5th grade. He worked hard all his life and was a little skeptical of sending his son to school. But to abide with the state laws, he sent his son to school. The son came home and the father asked the son, "Boy, what be you learn in school today?"
The son replied, "I learnt me some geometry."
The father said, "What you learnin' in geometry?"
The son said, "Pi R squared."
The father replied, "Boy, them city folk teachin' you all wrong! It ain't pi R squared! Pie are round, cornbread are square."
Click to expand...
I swear, I almost posted this very joke.
 
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