Behr
Real Realist for real.
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- Aug 7, 2009
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I too cringe when I hear some well meaning (I guess) motivational speaker tell kids "you can be anything you want to be"...That is the biggest lie we can tell them and its just plain untrue and I THINK it was birthed out of the "self motivational crowd"...now I agree with encouraging kids, especially if they have the bent for their early aspirations. There are rare exceptions to that rule I guess. I have a 6'6" nephew who was a great athlete but he scored perfectly on the ACT and was given a full ride to college and on to law school at Emory University. He's about as close and "be what you want to be" kinda of guy but that's a rare exception...and still he has limits...good post IMO...I'm sorry, but I have to chime in here. This sentiment is not only flat out wrong, it's actually very detrimental to our kids and society in general today.
I'm a teacher, so I'm trained to see the potential in all my students, but these days we tell ALL of our kids, "study hard, go to college, and make something of yourself - you can be anything you dream." Or some similar boiler-plate cliche trash. It's not true. Not in any way true.
Look, I'm 5'7" so the NBA is out because I can't leap like Spud Webb (though my first cousin was a UT record holder and 3-time NCAA national champion high jumper.) Football is my favorite sport, but I'm small boned, so I'd snap like a twig if I got hit hard by an elite defensive athlete - regardless of my physical conditioning (which can't make my bones bigger or stronger.) Fortunately for me, the world's greatest soccer player, Lionel Messi, is also 5'7". It's just a matter of opportunity. If I had the world's greatest training from the time I was a small child, like he had, and if I set my mind to it and worked at soccer conditioning and skills for 12 hours a day, like he did, then I could be a truly great soccer player. No I couldn't, and it's not even close. I don't have the fast twitch muscles of a world class athlete. I wasn't born with them and agility training won't magically create them within me. My first cousin was born with them, but I wasn't. No amount of polish is gonna turn my coal into a diamond.
I was, however, born with high intelligence and I've put it to good use. I probably had the brain power to become a doctor or some such, but I didn't have the drive, dedication, nor desire, so perhaps I failed to become all I could. You can be so lazy as to fail to reach your potential, but that's not the same thing as saying "if you work hard enough, you can be anything." NO YOU CAN'T. It's horrible for our children's self-esteem. You see, if they didn't make the team, it must be because they are too lazy to work hard enough. If they didn't make a 34 ACT so they could get a full academic scholarship to UT, it must be because they didn't study hard enough. No, many failures in life aren't caused by a lack of effort, they're caused by an unrealistically high goal. Very few humans have the intelligence to achieve a 34+ on the ACT and a lifetime of tutoring won't change whether you're on that list. That lifelong tutor can get you from 32 to 34, but when your 19 turns into a 23, nobody's gonna roll out a red carpet for you.
My first cousin tried three times to make the Olympics and all three times he failed. The goal wasn't unrealistic for him, but it would have been for me. Twice he missed the US Olympic team by one spot, and both times he didn't jump his best. And the Rams didn't win the Superbowl, but the dream was realistic. However, I kid you not, I have a room full of 7th grade boys who think they're gonna play in the NFL, or MLB, or NBA, or for Barcelona to be the next Messi. It ain't gonna happen, for any of them. Period. The data says so. A realistic goal would be make the high school team and see where it goes from there.
Why did I write this wall of text? I don't know. I'm just really bothered by the damage I see this sentiment doing to our young people. "You failed, you must not have tried hard enough." How awful.
AV
TL;DR - Work hard and achieve your dreams! As long as your dreams are realistic.
Understood. My seventeen year old son is 6'2" and ( at least) 290#'s. He played pewee, but had to diet to meet 105# limit for 8 year old travel team. He's not obese and is very strong. But, he just has no interest in playing in high school. He has the gifts, but, no desire. It's tragic. I could make him do it, but, what's the point?
I'm sorry, but I have to chime in here. This sentiment is not only flat out wrong, it's actually very detrimental to our kids and society in general today.
I'm a teacher, so I'm trained to see the potential in all my students, but these days we tell ALL of our kids, "study hard, go to college, and make something of yourself - you can be anything you dream." Or some similar boiler-plate cliche trash. It's not true. Not in any way true.
Look, I'm 5'7" so the NBA is out because I can't leap like Spud Webb (though my first cousin was a UT record holder and 3-time NCAA national champion high jumper.) Football is my favorite sport, but I'm small boned, so I'd snap like a twig if I got hit hard by an elite defensive athlete - regardless of my physical conditioning (which can't make my bones bigger or stronger.) Fortunately for me, the world's greatest soccer player, Lionel Messi, is also 5'7". It's just a matter of opportunity. If I had the world's greatest training from the time I was a small child, like he had, and if I set my mind to it and worked at soccer conditioning and skills for 12 hours a day, like he did, then I could be a truly great soccer player. No I couldn't, and it's not even close. I don't have the fast twitch muscles of a world class athlete. I wasn't born with them and agility training won't magically create them within me. My first cousin was born with them, but I wasn't. No amount of polish is gonna turn my coal into a diamond.
I was, however, born with high intelligence and I've put it to good use. I probably had the brain power to become a doctor or some such, but I didn't have the drive, dedication, nor desire, so perhaps I failed to become all I could. You can be so lazy as to fail to reach your potential, but that's not the same thing as saying "if you work hard enough, you can be anything." NO YOU CAN'T. It's horrible for our children's self-esteem. You see, if they didn't make the team, it must be because they are too lazy to work hard enough. If they didn't make a 34 ACT so they could get a full academic scholarship to UT, it must be because they didn't study hard enough. No, many failures in life aren't caused by a lack of effort, they're caused by an unrealistically high goal. Very few humans have the intelligence to achieve a 34+ on the ACT and a lifetime of tutoring won't change whether you're on that list. That lifelong tutor can get you from 32 to 34, but when your 19 turns into a 23, nobody's gonna roll out a red carpet for you.
My first cousin tried three times to make the Olympics and all three times he failed. The goal wasn't unrealistic for him, but it would have been for me. Twice he missed the US Olympic team by one spot, and both times he didn't jump his best. And the Rams didn't win the Superbowl, but the dream was realistic. However, I kid you not, I have a room full of 7th grade boys who think they're gonna play in the NFL, or MLB, or NBA, or for Barcelona to be the next Messi. It ain't gonna happen, for any of them. Period. The data says so. A realistic goal would be make the high school team and see where it goes from there.
Why did I write this wall of text? I don't know. I'm just really bothered by the damage I see this sentiment doing to our young people. "You failed, you must not have tried hard enough." How awful.
AV
TL;DR - Work hard and achieve your dreams! As long as your dreams are realistic.
I caught your almost, but I gave more weight to "regardless of ability or not." I'm also sure I pulled from the numerous examples I can point to over the years of exactly that "you can be anything" sentiment.So I did say "almost"...
You're a teacher you should have caught that?
Seems like you weren't focusing on what I wrote, rather than your own opinion.
I will counter with your level of assessment and pre-determination of ability is one thing wrong with the world.
However, thank you for being brave and deciding to help society by becoming a teacher.
To paraphrase office space... If everyone followed their dreams we wouldn't have school janitors.I'm sorry, but I have to chime in here. This sentiment is not only flat out wrong, it's actually very detrimental to our kids and society in general today.
I'm a teacher, so I'm trained to see the potential in all my students, but these days we tell ALL of our kids, "study hard, go to college, and make something of yourself - you can be anything you dream." Or some similar boiler-plate cliche trash. It's not true. Not in any way true.
Look, I'm 5'7" so the NBA is out because I can't leap like Spud Webb (though my first cousin was a UT record holder and 3-time NCAA national champion high jumper.) Football is my favorite sport, but I'm small boned, so I'd snap like a twig if I got hit hard by an elite defensive athlete - regardless of my physical conditioning (which can't make my bones bigger or stronger.) Fortunately for me, the world's greatest soccer player, Lionel Messi, is also 5'7". It's just a matter of opportunity. If I had the world's greatest training from the time I was a small child, like he had, and if I set my mind to it and worked at soccer conditioning and skills for 12 hours a day, like he did, then I could be a truly great soccer player. No I couldn't, and it's not even close. I don't have the fast twitch muscles of a world class athlete. I wasn't born with them and agility training won't magically create them within me. My first cousin was born with them, but I wasn't. No amount of polish is gonna turn my coal into a diamond.
I was, however, born with high intelligence and I've put it to good use. I probably had the brain power to become a doctor or some such, but I didn't have the drive, dedication, nor desire, so perhaps I failed to become all I could. You can be so lazy as to fail to reach your potential, but that's not the same thing as saying "if you work hard enough, you can be anything." NO YOU CAN'T. It's horrible for our children's self-esteem. You see, if they didn't make the team, it must be because they are too lazy to work hard enough. If they didn't make a 34 ACT so they could get a full academic scholarship to UT, it must be because they didn't study hard enough. No, many failures in life aren't caused by a lack of effort, they're caused by an unrealistically high goal. Very few humans have the intelligence to achieve a 34+ on the ACT and a lifetime of tutoring won't change whether you're on that list. That lifelong tutor can get you from 32 to 34, but when your 19 turns into a 23, nobody's gonna roll out a red carpet for you.
My first cousin tried three times to make the Olympics and all three times he failed. The goal wasn't unrealistic for him, but it would have been for me. Twice he missed the US Olympic team by one spot, and both times he didn't jump his best. And the Rams didn't win the Superbowl, but the dream was realistic. However, I kid you not, I have a room full of 7th grade boys who think they're gonna play in the NFL, or MLB, or NBA, or for Barcelona to be the next Messi. It ain't gonna happen, for any of them. Period. The data says so. A realistic goal would be make the high school team and see where it goes from there.
Why did I write this wall of text? I don't know. I'm just really bothered by the damage I see this sentiment doing to our young people. "You failed, you must not have tried hard enough." How awful.
AV
TL;DR - Work hard and achieve your dreams! As long as your dreams are realistic.
Inky does not approve this message.I'm sorry, but I have to chime in here. This sentiment is not only flat out wrong, it's actually very detrimental to our kids and society in general today.
I'm a teacher, so I'm trained to see the potential in all my students, but these days we tell ALL of our kids, "study hard, go to college, and make something of yourself - you can be anything you dream." Or some similar boiler-plate cliche trash. It's not true. Not in any way true.
Look, I'm 5'7" so the NBA is out because I can't leap like Spud Webb (though my first cousin was a UT record holder and 3-time NCAA national champion high jumper.) Football is my favorite sport, but I'm small boned, so I'd snap like a twig if I got hit hard by an elite defensive athlete - regardless of my physical conditioning (which can't make my bones bigger or stronger.) Fortunately for me, the world's greatest soccer player, Lionel Messi, is also 5'7". It's just a matter of opportunity. If I had the world's greatest training from the time I was a small child, like he had, and if I set my mind to it and worked at soccer conditioning and skills for 12 hours a day, like he did, then I could be a truly great soccer player. No I couldn't, and it's not even close. I don't have the fast twitch muscles of a world class athlete. I wasn't born with them and agility training won't magically create them within me. My first cousin was born with them, but I wasn't. No amount of polish is gonna turn my coal into a diamond.
I was, however, born with high intelligence and I've put it to good use. I probably had the brain power to become a doctor or some such, but I didn't have the drive, dedication, nor desire, so perhaps I failed to become all I could. You can be so lazy as to fail to reach your potential, but that's not the same thing as saying "if you work hard enough, you can be anything." NO YOU CAN'T. It's horrible for our children's self-esteem. You see, if they didn't make the team, it must be because they are too lazy to work hard enough. If they didn't make a 34 ACT so they could get a full academic scholarship to UT, it must be because they didn't study hard enough. No, many failures in life aren't caused by a lack of effort, they're caused by an unrealistically high goal. Very few humans have the intelligence to achieve a 34+ on the ACT and a lifetime of tutoring won't change whether you're on that list. That lifelong tutor can get you from 32 to 34, but when your 19 turns into a 23, nobody's gonna roll out a red carpet for you.
My first cousin tried three times to make the Olympics and all three times he failed. The goal wasn't unrealistic for him, but it would have been for me. Twice he missed the US Olympic team by one spot, and both times he didn't jump his best. And the Rams didn't win the Superbowl, but the dream was realistic. However, I kid you not, I have a room full of 7th grade boys who think they're gonna play in the NFL, or MLB, or NBA, or for Barcelona to be the next Messi. It ain't gonna happen, for any of them. Period. The data says so. A realistic goal would be make the high school team and see where it goes from there.
Why did I write this wall of text? I don't know. I'm just really bothered by the damage I see this sentiment doing to our young people. "You failed, you must not have tried hard enough." How awful.
AV
TL;DR - Work hard and achieve your dreams! As long as your dreams are realistic.
I too cringe when I hear some well meaning (I guess) motivational speaker tell kids "you can be anything you want to be"...That is the biggest lie we can tell them and its just plain untrue and I THINK it was birthed out of the "self motivational crowd"...now I agree with encouraging kids, especially if they have the bent for their early aspirations. There are rare exceptions to that rule I guess. I have a 6'6" nephew who was a great athlete but he scored perfectly on the ACT and was given a full ride to college and on to law school at Emory University. He's about as close and "be what you want to be" kinda of guy but that's a rare exception...and still he has limits...good post IMO...
Thats called helicopter parenting..Well, you may be right. i sure enjoyed watching my eight year old son dragging six players at one time during fun time during peewee practice. And was proud of the coach remarking that since he moved my son to center there were no botched snaps. (coach's son had been center). And the times right after weigh-in when I would buy him a hamburger to wolf down right before the game because he had to diet to make the weight limit. Show me a father who doesn't live vicariously through their son and I'll show you an absent dad, sarge.
I'm sorry, but I have to chime in here. This sentiment is not only flat out wrong, it's actually very detrimental to our kids and society in general today.
I'm a teacher, so I'm trained to see the potential in all my students, but these days we tell ALL of our kids, "study hard, go to college, and make something of yourself - you can be anything you dream." Or some similar boiler-plate cliche trash. It's not true. Not in any way true.
Look, I'm 5'7" so the NBA is out because I can't leap like Spud Webb (though my first cousin was a UT record holder and 3-time NCAA national champion high jumper.) Football is my favorite sport, but I'm small boned, so I'd snap like a twig if I got hit hard by an elite defensive athlete - regardless of my physical conditioning (which can't make my bones bigger or stronger.) Fortunately for me, the world's greatest soccer player, Lionel Messi, is also 5'7". It's just a matter of opportunity. If I had the world's greatest training from the time I was a small child, like he had, and if I set my mind to it and worked at soccer conditioning and skills for 12 hours a day, like he did, then I could be a truly great soccer player. No I couldn't, and it's not even close. I don't have the fast twitch muscles of a world class athlete. I wasn't born with them and agility training won't magically create them within me. My first cousin was born with them, but I wasn't. No amount of polish is gonna turn my coal into a diamond.
I was, however, born with high intelligence and I've put it to good use. I probably had the brain power to become a doctor or some such, but I didn't have the drive, dedication, nor desire, so perhaps I failed to become all I could. You can be so lazy as to fail to reach your potential, but that's not the same thing as saying "if you work hard enough, you can be anything." NO YOU CAN'T. It's horrible for our children's self-esteem. You see, if they didn't make the team, it must be because they are too lazy to work hard enough. If they didn't make a 34 ACT so they could get a full academic scholarship to UT, it must be because they didn't study hard enough. No, many failures in life aren't caused by a lack of effort, they're caused by an unrealistically high goal. Very few humans have the intelligence to achieve a 34+ on the ACT and a lifetime of tutoring won't change whether you're on that list. That lifelong tutor can get you from 32 to 34, but when your 19 turns into a 23, nobody's gonna roll out a red carpet for you.
My first cousin tried three times to make the Olympics and all three times he failed. The goal wasn't unrealistic for him, but it would have been for me. Twice he missed the US Olympic team by one spot, and both times he didn't jump his best. And the Rams didn't win the Superbowl, but the dream was realistic. However, I kid you not, I have a room full of 7th grade boys who think they're gonna play in the NFL, or MLB, or NBA, or for Barcelona to be the next Messi. It ain't gonna happen, for any of them. Period. The data says so. A realistic goal would be make the high school team and see where it goes from there.
Why did I write this wall of text? I don't know. I'm just really bothered by the damage I see this sentiment doing to our young people. "You failed, you must not have tried hard enough." How awful.
AV
TL;DR - Work hard and achieve your dreams! As long as your dreams are realistic.
I'm sorry, but I have to chime in here. This sentiment is not only flat out wrong, it's actually very detrimental to our kids and society in general today.
I'm a teacher, so I'm trained to see the potential in all my students, but these days we tell ALL of our kids, "study hard, go to college, and make something of yourself - you can be anything you dream." Or some similar boiler-plate cliche trash. It's not true. Not in any way true.
Look, I'm 5'7" so the NBA is out because I can't leap like Spud Webb (though my first cousin was a UT record holder and 3-time NCAA national champion high jumper.) Football is my favorite sport, but I'm small boned, so I'd snap like a twig if I got hit hard by an elite defensive athlete - regardless of my physical conditioning (which can't make my bones bigger or stronger.) Fortunately for me, the world's greatest soccer player, Lionel Messi, is also 5'7". It's just a matter of opportunity. If I had the world's greatest training from the time I was a small child, like he had, and if I set my mind to it and worked at soccer conditioning and skills for 12 hours a day, like he did, then I could be a truly great soccer player. No I couldn't, and it's not even close. I don't have the fast twitch muscles of a world class athlete. I wasn't born with them and agility training won't magically create them within me. My first cousin was born with them, but I wasn't. No amount of polish is gonna turn my coal into a diamond.
I was, however, born with high intelligence and I've put it to good use. I probably had the brain power to become a doctor or some such, but I didn't have the drive, dedication, nor desire, so perhaps I failed to become all I could. You can be so lazy as to fail to reach your potential, but that's not the same thing as saying "if you work hard enough, you can be anything." NO YOU CAN'T. It's horrible for our children's self-esteem. You see, if they didn't make the team, it must be because they are too lazy to work hard enough. If they didn't make a 34 ACT so they could get a full academic scholarship to UT, it must be because they didn't study hard enough. No, many failures in life aren't caused by a lack of effort, they're caused by an unrealistically high goal. Very few humans have the intelligence to achieve a 34+ on the ACT and a lifetime of tutoring won't change whether you're on that list. That lifelong tutor can get you from 32 to 34, but when your 19 turns into a 23, nobody's gonna roll out a red carpet for you.
My first cousin tried three times to make the Olympics and all three times he failed. The goal wasn't unrealistic for him, but it would have been for me. Twice he missed the US Olympic team by one spot, and both times he didn't jump his best. And the Rams didn't win the Superbowl, but the dream was realistic. However, I kid you not, I have a room full of 7th grade boys who think they're gonna play in the NFL, or MLB, or NBA, or for Barcelona to be the next Messi. It ain't gonna happen, for any of them. Period. The data says so. A realistic goal would be make the high school team and see where it goes from there.
Why did I write this wall of text? I don't know. I'm just really bothered by the damage I see this sentiment doing to our young people. "You failed, you must not have tried hard enough." How awful.
AV
TL;DR - Work hard and achieve your dreams! As long as your dreams are realistic.
Thank goodness Michael Jordan and David Robinson didn’t limit their dreams to reality at such an early age. Show me a person who realized their dream and didn’t work hard to achieve it. Even Lane Kiffin realized his dream. I can’t imagine what his teachers thought of him.
His dream was to be the head football coach at USC which he did. The problem was, they fired him.Thank goodness Michael Jordan and David Robinson didn’t limit their dreams to reality at such an early age. Show me a person who realized their dream and didn’t work hard to achieve it. Even Lane Kiffin realized his dream. I can’t imagine what his teachers thought of him.
I caught your almost, but I gave more weight to "regardless of ability or not." I'm also sure I pulled from the numerous examples I can point to over the years of exactly that "you can be anything" sentiment.
In the last 10 years there's been a major push in the education field to send every student to college. This is beyond ludicrous and an absurd waste of resources. A lot of students lack the mental capacity to belong at that level. They are never going to build a bridge, perform a surgery, or pass the bar or their college classes for that matter. That's perfectly ok. Someone needs to drive the tractor, build cars, lay train track, weld our Navy's ships, and repair my car when I can't because I don't know how or don't have time. What's worse is this attitude makes everyone who didn't go to school feel inferior, as if college goers are somehow better. We're not, we just do a job that needed a degree. I am super thankful for Haslem's initiative to pay for two years of college for all, which seems to contradict what I just said. The catch is it includes vocational programs, so students who aren't college material can still get valuable, certified training to go into high paying fields. My step-son's father, like 44 years old, just "went back to school" for free. He got his auto body certificate and now paints private jets for superstars.
Oh, and I don't "assess and pre-determine" ability beyond the data and statistics. Do you know what percentage of high school athletes even get a college scholarship, let alone make the pros? It's just not realistic to believe you can be anything you want to be.
I'm sorry, but I have to chime in here. This sentiment is not only flat out wrong, it's actually very detrimental to our kids and society in general today.
I'm a teacher, so I'm trained to see the potential in all my students, but these days we tell ALL of our kids, "study hard, go to college, and make something of yourself - you can be anything you dream." Or some similar boiler-plate cliche trash. It's not true. Not in any way true.
Killer Mike "Triggered" ?
I agree to an extent just curious if you watched the episode of Triggered where Killer Mike goes to Kindergarten class and says basically the same thing to a bunch of kids and their teacher.
