Dante Phillips a VOL!

#327
#327
Just curious, do they adjust the rankings for the signing classes after they see who actually gets in and any late additions?
 
#328
#328
OrangePappy said:
Just curious, do they adjust the rankings for the signing classes after they see who actually gets in and any late additions?
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I'm not sure. We should ask OCI. Also, if somebody could verify that that Phillips guy is definitely a Vol, that would be amazing. I hope CP qualifies! Could you imagine if we have him, DR, and JH on the field at the same time!?
 
#330
#330
peyton4heisman said:
Knoxville offers many anger-management groups at little to no cost. I would recommend trying ine out if you are local or seeking one out near where you live if not. I also recommend that if you own a gun that you turn it in to a sane person asap. Also, I recommend getting some. Pay for it if you must. Lastly, I recommend that you try your very best to not be an idiot. That's my advice. Take it or leave it. If you choose to leave it, Darwinism will take care of you soon.
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In all fairness, the first two are already dead.
 
#332
#332
Melvie89 said:
I've been on here longer than you have...I just have a life (while working and studying full time) and don't always get to log into VN as much as you apparently do.
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45 posts in 3 years.

Sleeper.

GAVol said:
Leave the troll hunting to us. :hi:
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I've noticed a few have disappeared, maybe you guys are finally stepping up to the plate.

orutvol said:
It's not UTK Law school. Most people call it UT College of Law.
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Exactly.

And only outsiders refer to UT as UTK.

AJeray4TN said:
Don't sleep on Pellissippi State now. It's a fine academic institution. Some of UT's finest drop-outs have bettered their GPAs at PSCC, unbeknownst to their parents.
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I invented 'bettering your GPA at PSCC unbeknownst to your parents'.

I was a pioneer.

:dance:

DjCrenshaw said:
Man, I hope Dante doesn't read this thread. He may get confused and accidently sign up for knoxville college or something.
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OK that was funny. Now shaddup.
 
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#334
#334
Milo, you're banning anybody that says anything remotely negative about the state of our football program, or makes a prediction of anything less than 11 wins now?

Uh oh.
 
#336
#336
Negateer said:
No, they're banning trolls with multiple usernames who are here simply to stir up negative vibes.

That would be my guess.



It's about time. This place was a free-for-all trollfest last year.
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says the guy with nega in his name. Irony at its best.
 
#337
#337
Negateer said:
45 posts in 3 years.

Sleeper.



I've noticed a few have disappeared, maybe you guys are finally stepping up to the plate.



Exactly.

And only outsiders refer to UT as UTK.



I invented 'bettering your GPA at PSCC unbeknownst to your parents'.

I was a pioneer.

:dance:



OK that was funny. Now shaddup.
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Mod, I found a troll!!!!
Get 'em!!!
 
#338
#338
Welcome aboard Dante, some more help on the d line and he has the potential to be a beast.. Defence wins championships baby. Go Vols
 
#339
#339
Thanks, woodsman! Indeed I was getting dazed & confused over the abbreviation frenzy...not to mention the sockpuppet stew! Now that I know about Dante Phillips, let's GO GET HIM!
 
#341
#341
peyton4heisman said:
Knoxville offers many anger-management groups at little to no cost. I would recommend trying ine out if you are local or seeking one out near where you live if not. I also recommend that if you own a gun that you turn it in to a sane person asap. Also, I recommend getting some. Pay for it if you must. Lastly, I recommend that you try your very best to not be an idiot. That's my advice. Take it or leave it. If you choose to leave it, Darwinism will take care of you soon.
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Are you in this pencil neck's league?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMkOjOOJt_w[/youtube]
 
#343
#343
feathersax said:
Thanks, woodsman! Indeed I was getting dazed & confused over the abbreviation frenzy...not to mention the sockpuppet stew! Now that I know about Dante Phillips, let's GO GET HIM!
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Dude, its hard keeping up with everything. This forum is great for questions like that, these guys on here are pro's (most are, some are annoying trolls like Negateer but you can see that from his posts)
 
#345
#345
Can I post more lawyer jokes?

Just a few like:

Q: What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?
A: The caterer.

Q: What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?
A: Lipstick.

Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
A: Your Honor.
Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50
A: Senator.

Q: What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?
A: Accountants know they're boring.

Q: What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?
A: A jury.

Q: Why did God invent lawyers?
A: So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.

Q: What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?
A: The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.

Q: What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?
A: A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.

Q: What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?
A: A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.

Q: What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?
A: One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?
A: You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?
A: After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and God?
A: God doesn't think he's a lawyer.

Q: How are an apple and a lawyer alike?
A: They both look good hanging from a tree.

Q: How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?
A: She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.

Q: How does an attorney sleep?
A: First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.

Q: How many lawyer jokes are there?
A: Only three. The rest are true stories.

Q: How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.

Q: What are lawyers good for?
A: They make used car salesmen look good.

Q: What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?
A: They're both extinct.

Q: What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?
A: Not enough cement.

Q: What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?
A: Skeet.

Q: What do you call a lawyer gone bad.
A: Senator.

Q: What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?
A: His partners.

Q: What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?
A: Taller

Q: What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?
A: A Doberman.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?
A: The pronunciation.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?
A: A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?
A: The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.

Q: What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?
A: One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.

Q: Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?
A: To practice.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?
A: The lawyer charges more.

Q: What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?
A: The tick falls off when you are dead.

Q: What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?
A: I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.

Q: Know how copper wire was invented?
A: Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.

Q: Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?
A: To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.

Q: What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?
A: Stick his bill up his ass.

Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: Their lips are moving.

Q: Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?
A: New Jersey got to pick first.

Q: Why don't lawyers go to the beach?
A: Cats keep trying to bury them.

Q: What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start!

Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the skunk.

Q: Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
A: Professional courtesy.

Q: What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
A: Not enough sand.

Q: How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
A: Cut the rope.

Q: Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?
A: Take your foot off his head.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?
A: The bucket.

Q: What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?
A: When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.

Q: What is the definition of a "crying shame"?
A: There was an empty seat.

Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?
A: An offer you can't understand

Q: Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?
A: From chasing parked ambulances.

Q: Where can you find a good lawyer?
A: In the cemetery

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?
A: A gigolo only screws one person at a time.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?
A: A vampire only sucks blood at night.

Q: Why to lawyers wear neckties?
A: To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.

Q: What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?
A: When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.

Q: How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.

Q: If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?
A: It might be your bicycle.

Q: What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?
A: The caterer.

Q: Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?
A: Because deep down, they're really good people.

Q: Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?
A: If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.

Q: What do lawyers and sperm have in common?
A: One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
 
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#346
#346
Umm...anyway...I think that we should start to try to guess what number Phillips will be come Aug 2. Gives us something to do other than tell lawyer jokes...
 
#348
#348
SkidsisVFL said:
Umm...anyway...I think that we should start to try to guess what number Phillips will be come Aug 2. Gives us something to do other than tell lawyer jokes...
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CAN YOU READ? There are only a total of 3 lawyer jokes, the rest are true stories.
 
#349
#349
The jokes are funny. Some I've never heard.

I've done a little research by watching tape on Dante Phillips- he really is a great addition to the team. It's crazy how we stumbled on him and won him over without having chased him much early. It was definitely luck to land such a talent and a sure 1st or 2nd round draft pick one day. Dooley does it again!
 
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