Long Post Jxn i hope you will bear with me. I don't care if anyone else decides to read a word.
Yup I was lucky as hell. My Pulmonologist PA was actually the one who laid it out, he advised me I would be a vent by that evening, and likely dead in 48, and that if I wanted to say anything to anyone I should go ahead and call. That sounds harsh but that was very important it allowed me to get the mental str while barely able to talk and breathe to call my dad, brother inlaw, and be for ready for death and assurances they would take care of my wife and son. To say I appreciate that frankness was an understatement, it also convinced me I would give it everything I had at that moment, I proned positions for like 2-3+ days straight, someone else had to help me pee, and my only food was a little bit through a straw that was dicey while on a bipap and after that 12 hours a for a week I proned. My spine felt like it had a knife in it (proning long term will F You up!), and I never was under 170bpm, it's like running down a steep hill and if you trip you die, but you have to do it for a week or more. I was on a bipap on the highest setting it could go to maxed out, it sounded like a jet engine (for those that don't know this is not like a home bipap this is a huge machine that forces high pressure air into your lungs) , and my bpm had been 170+ resting for like a week like I said it was an insane experience I can never truly explain to people. The bipap had reached it's limit and I was damn lucky to have it because it was the last one. other people in my situation were having to go to vent because no bipap was available, and here I was knowing people likely are dying because I have this machine.
Across town a friend of mine's brother went to the "other" hopsital and before he even was at the level to need a Bipap they immediately put him on remdesivir and the vent, the intibation process alone was enough to basically euthenize him. he had let them know he did not want the remdesivir, his family said no to it, and they gave it to him anyway cause .....money from govt!.... and he died. They (that hospital) were getting govt kickbacks for using this protocol, and killing ALOT of patients. I lucked out that my ambulance took me to Memorial instead, and I got the last bipap.
That Physicians assistant pulmonologist that was frank with me, is also who I credit with saving my life more then any other. We'd talked a couple of times personally he'd taken an interest in me I'd showed him pics of my son and wife and how much I wanted to live etc, and I guess he was tired of seeing people die, he went home and apparently was up all night checking experimental treatments etc, guy had already been on frontlines watching people die for months, he came back and got permission to give me a treatment that basically was every steroid possible and just throw them all at me and taper down. They had not done this method prior. It worked. I'm alive. I owe him my life. I asked him why I made it, and he said most people who get to where I was give up they just quit, it hurts to much. I dunno that I am tougher but I only knew I could not leave my family.
Let me tell you who actually nearly COST me my life though. I won't name names. If I wanted to sue I would have a long time ago. But My Internal Medicine Doctor who was also a board certified know it all sheep. I had already been hospitalized once had gotten over COVID so I thought, and was being sent home (too early). They cut me off steroids completely the moment I left. It was like a smoldering fire in a closed room. If you understand anything about covid and how it killed people you know what happened next. It was the cytokine storm that was killing people, when your lungs attack themselves. I Immediately went to see him upon getting out he looked over all my meds but did not think once about the stoppage of steroids (this was common knowledge, and probably worthy of a lawsuit) even though they knew this was the issue coast to coast and even nurses knew it. I immediately got worse and worse, and I came back and his response was to put me on antibiots because maybe I had another infection. This after a c-scan taht showed my lungs as solid white inflamed horror show. I was coughing so bad literally people were coming out of other rooms to see what was going on and this ****er gave me antibiotics and see ya in a month as a response a couple of days later my oxygen plummeted to 40 and I nearly died at home in bed when ambulance got there, all I could hear was the thunder of my heart. the oxygen the medic gave me barely got there in time. When they saw my treatment at hospital they were like who the hell is was this physician. He was a BOARD CERTIFIED INTERNAL MEDICINE doctor. He is apart of a healthcare practice that MANY people use that is SUPPOSED to be really good. Also never did anything beyond what official AMA says....absolute sheep......I should have never gone back to hospital much less full blown cytokine storm etc......he dropped the fing ball, it never occured to me to sue that's not what my fam usually does, I have many medical professionals in the family and it's just not how we think. But yeah my faith in him and the majority of doctors were dead after that.
I turned the corner and was so wasted away I had to go to rehab to learn to walk again, I had always had huge legs i used to push like 800 lbs on leg lifts. Now they looked like arms not legs. I had been in hospital counting 1st and 2nd and then rehab about 3 months in total. I was on oxygen for a year when I got out, took alot of PT to get mobile, and regain muscle and leg strength. Luckily I left that dumb ass Internist and found a old country doc Who had been on the bleeding edge of covid treatment the entire time, via ivermectin, hydrochloroquine etc. He also was one of the first to realize benefit of NAC and LDN for recovery.....he was reading research daily, and I don't think one of his patients died. When he wasn't seeingh patients he was reading papers, and he has consitantly been ahead of the curve at every step for treating long term issues. He I credit for getting me back to normal after a LTC battle that was about 2 years after going home. If he'd been my doctor before I'd have never even been hospitalized. the Interernist that nearly got me killed I am sure would call him a kook.
I may not be a doctor but I have read just about everything you can read on this with papers, studies etc. I lived it, I know what worked and what didn't. The one thing that has changed forever is trusting someone knows what their talking about just because of a degree, title or certification and in the end I know it was the Pulmonologist PA staying up at home after already working a nightmare shift looking for any new possible treatment and getting no sleep and not the actual Dr who saved my life. But also the TEAM of Doctors at a hospital that allowed them to do their job, where the admin hadn't forced them to euthenize patients via CDC protocols for government paychecks.
So it doesn't surprise me when some "I can do no wrong" Dr with a deity complex comes in and still defends the indefensible. They know they killed people, they may have even killed family members...they're still living with that. They refuse to admit they were wrong. They do not want to hear or see evidence to the contrary. To do so would be to face their guilt.