Babylon Bee thread.

[StarRaider]

11 Pickup Lines For Getting Chicks At A 'No Kings' Rally

A "No Kings" rally isn't just an excuse to take off work while protesting a thing that doesn't exist in America — it's also a great way to find love. Knowing what the chicks at a "No Kings" protest want to hear is the key.

babylonbee.com

"I also hate Trump, and I can't coherently explain why."
It's important to point out what you have in common.

"Are your Birkenstocks making your feet sore? Because you've been running through my mind all day."
It goes a long way to compliment her on her fashion style.

"Hey, there. Do you identify as a woman?"
Misgendering right off the bat can kill your chances.

"We should set up a play date for our vegan trans cats."
Sometimes, the quickest way to a girl's heart is through her non-binary pets.

"I don't want to brag, but I once bench pressed 20 pounds."
Guaranteed to impress.

"What's your favorite episode of The View?"
Once she finds out you love listening to screeching harpies, you're in.

"No kings, but YAS QUEEN, am I right?"
You smooth operator, you.

"I love the way the wind blows through your pink and green hair."
Let her know that you find her attractive.

"I couldn't help but notice your insane screaming from across the street."
Nothing wrong with a little sweet-talking.

"Want to go grab an oat milk latte and avocado toast after the rally?"
Thoughtful and romantic.

"You're the most beautiful woman I've seen since Hillary Clinton."
Once you drop this baby on her, she'll be yours.

 

[StarRaider]

 

[Rickyvol77]

She may be the most ignorant Supreme Court justice in history

 

[BigOrangeMojo]

She may be the most ignorant Supreme Court justice in history

She isnt. She's just a gigantic partisan hack and no different than Thomas, Alito, Sotomayor, Kagan in which she can't look at a partisan issue without partisan shades on....

 

[bamawriter]

She isnt. She's just a gigantic partisan hack and no different than Thomas, Alito, Sotomayor, Kagan in which she can't look at a partisan issue without partisan shades on....

I will give Kagan some credit. Not only did she join the Chiles decision, her concurrence was actually coherent and fundamentally reasonable.

 

[BigOrangeMojo]

I will give Kagan some credit. Not only did she join the Chiles decision, her concurrence was actually coherent and fundamentally reasonable.

Chiles should have been a 9-0 but KJB forgot to take off the partisan shades....

Hell, when SS agrees with the majority...

 

[StarRaider]

If Kagan joins a Sotomayor/Jackson opinion, it’s likely at least plausible.

If Kagan declines to join a Sotomayor/Jackson opinion, it’s definitely insane.

If *Sotomayor* declines to join a *Jackson* opinion, you’re in for a real treat.

 

[bamawriter]

Chiles should have been a 9-0 but KJB forgot to take off the partisan shades....

Hell, when SS agrees with the majority...

Jackson doesn't even pretend that her opinions are based on the law.

 

[Rickyvol77]

She isnt. She's just a gigantic partisan hack and no different than Thomas, Alito, Sotomayor, Kagan in which she can't look at a partisan issue without partisan shades on....

Even Sotomayer and Kagan think she is low IQ. I’ve never seen a justice get routinely owned by the other justices in their briefs.

 

[hndog609]

Jackson doesn't even pretend that her opinions are based on the law.

Jackson thinks Park Si-Hun beat Roy Jones Jr for the gold in Seoul.

 

[LibertyVol]

Jackson doesn't even pretend that her opinions are based on the law.

The last thing that matters to lefties is the law. It is almost always the ends justifies the means.

 

[StarRaider]