"When I was a young man, I wanted to change the world.
I found it was difficult to change the world, so I tried to change my nation.
When I found I couldn't change the nation, I began to focus on my town.
I couldn't change the town and as an older man, I tried to change my family.
Now, as an old man, I realize the only thing I can change is myself, and suddenly I
realize that if long ago I had
changed myself, I could have made an impact on my family.
My family and I could have made an impact on our town.
Their impact could have changed the nation and I could indeed have changed the world.
Author: Unknown Monk 1100 A.D.
My Father, Your Father, Husband, Grandfather, Friend, was not here to change the world. Not on a grand scale at least. But by making sure that he took care of his own little piece of the world, he has indeed made the world a better place.
Please take a moment and pray with me:
Dear Lord,
Thank you for bringing us all together safely to honor and remember my father, your son, JG Hoffmeyer. Please help us to continue to do his work, and Your work, as we do our part to make this world a better place.
The Lord is my shepherd,
I shall not want;
He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters;
He restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousness
for His name's sake.
Even though I walk through the valley
of the shadow of death,
I fear no evil;
for You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
all the days of my life;
and I shall dwell in the house of the
Lord forever.
Amen
My father,JG Bud Hoffmeyer was born on January 14th, 1933 in Homer MI to Kenneth and Reta Hoffmeyer. As the 3rd of 4 children, he was a worker from day one. Whether he was driving mules on his grandmothers farm, or building his first car from scratch, there was always work to be done.
My Aunt Shirley told a story a couple days ago that described my dad well. She talked about how, as a young girl, before she was diagnosed with Polio, she had trouble walking up a step (or a curb) on the way to school. She fell, and kids started laughing and making fun of her. But her big brother picked her up, and carried her into school. Shortly after that day, she was diagnosed with Polio. And the next day, her big brother was at school beating the daylights out of the kids that had teased his little sister.
At the age of 17, he enlisted AGAINST HIS MOTHERS WISHES in the US AirForce. He spent the Korean War in Okinawa as an Air Plane Mechanic. After his discharge, he returned home to Lansing and worked at Fisher Body and Oldsmobile. He was married in 1954 and had 3 sons, J Gilbert who died at 3days old, and my two oldest brothers, Chuck in 1956 and Mike in 1958. After his divorce, he found himself raising his two boys on dry macaroni and cheese and chili, and needing a babysitter.
While sitting at the Moose Lodge one night, his parents neighbor spoke up and said My daughter would LOVE to babysit your kids. While she didnt necessarily want to watch these two little rodent children, she did think that there was something dashing and debonair about her neighbors kid, the young JG Hoffmeyer.
While details of the courtship can change, depending on who you hear it from, there is one thing that few can argue, and that is that this was the perfect match. My Mom Penny, and my dad were married on Sept 1st 1962. Within 3 years, they had 3 more children (Rick, Karen and I), and were raising 5 children in a tiny little house on Denver St.
I think it is very important to add here that I have never had half brothers. My parents would never allow us to look at life that way, and we never wanted to.
My dad had very simple rules for our house
1) Do as I say, or go get the belt out of the drawer
2) No visitors or phone calls during dinner, or you get ½ hour in bed
3) Be in the house when the street lights come on
4) Dont cuss in front of your mother
5) You dont get up from the table until your mother says you are excused
6) You eat whats on the table, whether you like it or not, unless it is Liver.
7) If something is worth doing, do it right.
During our childhood, my dad was a Union Sheet Metal Worker. He was a craftsman, who believed that your work is your calling card. The quality of your work determines the quality of your reputation. The quality of your reputation determines how much work you will get. He also believed that if you dropped your pipe off the 8th floor of a building, it was worth the walk, and the duct tape, to retrieve it and fix it.
There were times growing up when my dad would work 12 hour days because that was what was needed to have a job. There were times where he would work 8 hours, come home for dinner and then go back out and work the side jobs, because that is what was needed to put food on the table. And there were times when he would get laid off, and come home and tell mom to start packing the bags, were going to Disneyland!!!
Most people think about my dad and think work. And while I have a ton of memories that revolve around work, my greatest memories revolve around PLAY. We spent many weekends at the lake, whether it was in Mecosta at my Grandma and Grandpa Hoffmeyers cottage, or in the little town of Lake MI at Grandma and Grandpa Bartletts place, or maybe a trip to the Mackinaw Bridge, Or Tequamanon falls. Trips to Florida were never just to hang out and visit. There were things to do and places to see. Off your butt and on yer feet. It was a common theme throughout my dads life.
Most people also see my dad for his stern, grouchy exterior. They see the man that invented the word no good sonuva no good sonuva no good sonuva
..PUP while working on cars in the driveway. They see the man who would make us get the belt from the drawer, and then make us walk past his chair while he would give us a spanking with it
..and then we had to also take care of the belt. They see the grouchy old man that kept things in order on Denver St.
But it is hard to ignore the man that put speakers in the pumpkins on Halloween, and then spoke to kids through the intercom as they came to the door for candy. Or the man that had to have his turn on the skis or the tube at the lake every weekend. Or the man that would ride the zipline on the playground at Rayner park at a grandkids birthday party.
The older we got, and as we started to have kids of our own, we started to see more of my dads other sides. Back in the 1980s, when he started his own Heating and Cooling business, I had just begun my Sheet Metal Apprenticeship. During times I was laid off, I would draw my unemployment, and I would also work for my dad. It was then that I learned that the language my dad used in front of my mom, and what he used on a jobsite, were two different languages. I also learned how to be a craftsman, and how to do things right the first time.
We also learned that my dad had a soft side. Michael J was the first grandkid, and we watched as my dad fed him babyfood, and popcorn, played with him on the floor. We watched what seemed to be the melting of a grumpy old man, when in reality, it was there all along. All of his grandkids were important to him and he loved them dearly. And just like his kids, and his nieces and nephews, he was proud of them, and proud of who they have become.
Its often said that a mans legacy can be judged not by the things he did, but by the family and friends that he leaves behind when he is gone. My father left behind great friends, and great relationships with the people he worked for and with. He was respected for how he treated people as well as the work that he did. He left behind nieces and nephews that I believe will all agree that they are better people for having him as an uncle. He left behind grandkids who got the best side of him all the time, who were spoiled absolutely stinking rotten by him, and who are doing great things with their lives because they have had a great role model as a grandfather. He left behind 5 kids that will now always have a gap in life. Who now must figure out how to do things for themselves because they cant call and check their opinions with him before doing something. But who have all become kind, caring adults who try to make a difference in the lives of others. And he left behind a wife who loved him for 50 years, and will love him for another 50, and wont need to hear it from him to know that he loves her back.
As we walk out of here today, we can be assured of a 3 things:
1) His family, friends, and neighbors were very important to him. He would do whatever you needed, whenever you need it. I do not recall a single time where he put the wants or needs of himself over the needs of others. Treat people as you want to be treated.
2) As his children, we know that he loved us, and was never disappointed in who we became. Not because he TOLD us so, but because he SHOWED us. I do not remember one time in my life when I got a hug from my father, or when he said the words I Love You. But he showed it, every day. He showed it by the things he did for us. He showed us by being there when we needed help, or someone to talk to, or to someone to straighten us out. He showed us by example, not by words.
3) I know that he loved our mother more than anything else in the world. We know it because he told her once, 50 years ago, and if that ever changed, he would let her know. We know because he showed us. He taught us that love was not about words, it was about actions. My father never had to sit me down and tell me how to treat a lady. He showed me, everyday. And when he told stories about our mom, his eyes twinkled. And his heart smiled.
When I remember my dad, my favorite memories will always be about how he showed us how to live. Please honor my father when you leave here today, not by mourning him, but by celebrating who he was, and how he lived. Go change your little part of the world, and make the whole world a better place.
