Bama Jokes

#54
#54
Whats the difference between a mosquito and a BAMA cheerleader?

a. You can slap a mosquito and it will stop sucking
 
#55
#55
a tornado hits Tuscaloosa and causes $1.5 billion dollars in IMPROVEMENTS, and yeah bryant denny Stadium is one of them...... what a dream :)
 
#61
#61
Lofton4Three said:
You have to understand with him being from Alabama he was taught growing up that having sex with a non-family member is rape...

He's just a law-abiding citizen of Alabama...
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Thought that one would get a rise out of you guys. All in good fun.
 
#64
#64
Three Scientists, one a UT grad, one a Florida grad, the other a Bama grad are all given a bird for an experiment.
The UT grad is first. He clips off one of the birds legs, tosses it in the air while saying " Fly Bird, Fly". The bird flies off. He writes in is book " Bird can fly with one leg missing".
Next is the Florida grad. He clips off both of the birds legs, tosses it in the air while saying " Fly Bird, Fly". The bird flies off. He writes in his book " Bird can fly with both legs missing".
Last, but not least, is the Bama grad. He looks over the bird, thinking very hard of a way to top the other two scientists. All of a sudden it comes to him!! He clips off both wings. He the tosses the bird in the air while saying " Fly Bird Fly". The bird falls to the ground. He picks it up again, tosses it in the air "Fly Bird Fly". Again it falls to the ground. He tries once again, tossing the bird in the air, " FLY BIRD FLY!!!". Once again, the bird falls to the ground. He writes in his book:

"Bird cannot hear with both wings missing"
 
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#65
#65
CountVolcula said:
Three Scientists, one a UT grad, one a Florida grad, the other a Bama grad are all given a bird for an experiment.
The UT grad is first. He clips off one of the birds legs, tosses it in the air while saying " Fly Bird, Fly". The bird flies off. He writes in is book " Bird can fly with one leg missing".
Next is the Florida grad. He clips off both of the birds legs, tosses it in the air while saying " Fly Bird, Fly". The bird flies off. He writes in his book " Bird can fly with both legs missing".
Last, but not least, is the Bama grad. He looks over the bird, thinking very hard of a way to top the other two scientists. All of a sudden it comes to him!! He clips off both wings. He the tosses the bird in the air while saying " Fly Bird Fly". The bird falls to the ground. He picks it up again, tosses it in the air "Fly Bird Fly". Again it falls to the ground. He tries once again, tossing the bird in the air, " FLY BIRD FLY!!!". Once again, the bird falls to the ground. He writes in his book:

"Bird cannot hear with both wings missing"
Click to expand...


Bama: the Ed-jew-kay-shun state
 
#67
#67
Did you know the tooth brush was invented in Alabama…

If it had been invented anywhere else in the world it would had been called a teeth brush.
 
#68
#68
What are the 3 biggest lies told in Alabama?

1) No that is not my spit cup.

2) She is not my sister.

3) I swear officer, I was just trying to help the goat over the fence.
 
#72
#72
Bama fan Bubba is walking down the street with a bag over his shoulder. Walking towards him is Bama fan
Chester. When they get close, bama fan Chester asks, "Hey, Bubba...what ya got in that dar bag?" Bubba answers, "Oh, jest sum chickens." Chester asks, "Well, if i guess how many ya got in dar, will ya give me one?" Bubba replies, "Shoooot Chester, I'll give ya both of em!"
 
#73
#73
Jasongivm6 said:
Bama fan Bubba is walking down the street with a bag over his shoulder. Walking towards him is Bama fan
Chester. When they get close, bama fan Chester asks, "Hey, Bubba...what ya got in that dar bag?" Bubba answers, "Oh, jest sum chickens." Chester asks, "Well, if i guess how many ya got in dar, will ya give me one?" Bubba replies, "Shoooot Chester, I'll give ya both of em!"
Click to expand...

haha simple but hilarious!
 
#74
#74
up-1QHMT7MVQEFJNATG.jpg
 
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