Let's talk candidates...

#32
#32
patrick said:
not if you consider that Dave Hart (AKA Frankenstein) is our AD.
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Hard to do your job when you have someone like nose picker himself breathing down your neck constantly.

Cheek will be the reason behind a crappy hire, not Hart. If we do get a home run hire it will be because Hart told him to get lost like he should have a long time ago.
 
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#34
#34
If they want to win pay Greg Marshall what he needs to make the move. If it's 3 million per season so be it.
 
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#37
#37
rickyyrs said:
Not going to happen. Tennessee is not going to pay a lot for a basketball coach. You will see. It will not be a big name coach we hire.
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I agree it will probably be whoever is coaching at La Tech right?

Although in this case that wouldn't be a bad hire. It's just most fans want a proven winner!
 
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#42
#42
Ben Howland in the mix according to Russell W.

However with Howland comes much baggage.
 
#46
#46
There's a great coach/recruiter at Creighton by the name of Steve Lutz. Problem is, he hasn't had a head gig yet, and I doubt we give the job to a first-time coach. His name is worth mentioning though, IMO. I would love to see us get him.
 
#50
#50
Tell yall what. I'll take the job. Settle down though, because I have a few conditions and changes I want to make.

First off, we're switching to Fila gear across the board. That may not be popular with any of you, but frankly I'm tired of the *****ing that takes place debating Nike and Adidas so screw it! We're wearing Fila. Go get a new t-shirt and support the team.

Secondly, I'm bringing back the glory days of recruiting. Attached to every letter I send will be a $100 bill, so yall start mailing your weekly contributions in today. This allows for a few items to be cleared up. I mail the letters, you provide the money. We both share the responsibilty.

I'm also taking out the first 6 rows of bleachers and the home team benches at the Arena. We're all gonna stand damn it. Fans too! If you cant stand up for 35 minutes as a player, you cant play for me. Oh and about the extra 5 minutes of game time I didnt account for, I'll get to that in a bit.

We're gonna start using women's basketballs now. Why you ask? Because the girls dont seem to have a problem putting it through the same damn hoop so maybe ours is defective? Its not rocket science here fellas, its physics. Read a book once in a while you idiots.

I'm cutting the game time down to 35 minutes. This allows for 5 minutes of free speech time for those fans that want to recognize Bruce Pearl's accomplishments while coaching here. You want to do it, and I dont mind hearing it so here ya go. Dont go over those 5 minutes though because I got crap to do back at the house.

Coaching expectations:

I expect to win dammit. You're paying for this carnival so put up or shut up.

If I lead em to the Sweet 16, I want a new truck filled with $ for next years recruits. If I get to the Elite 8, I want another new truck filled with $ to cover the tab from the celebration party the night before. Final 4 gets me two free punches on Steven Pearl and Layla Kiffin alone in a closet for exactly 17 minutes. Why 17? Because thats all it takes dammit!

Lastly, I'm gonna have to start a tutorial program because you people will most likely be paying for some first class crayon chewers. I dont want any "book smart" kids on my roster. C average or less is my target audience. No need for education to get in the way of whats important here, (wearing Fila, kicking ass, and taking names). I expect all the smart kids from the band, tennis team, and even some of those Christian sororities to pitch in to tutor my boys for little/next to nothing. It may not be what they expected in their college experience, but tough sh!t sissies. This is a new day!

Coaching Style:
Give me enough $ for dudes that can dunk and I'll take care of the rest. I dont run real "plays". Its more like a full court, layup line, style of offense. If, and its a stretch, if we pass it to the white kid standing by the 3 point line, and if, I happen to yell shoot, its means one of two things: If he makes it - fine. If he misses, I just signaled the sniper to take that no shooting loser out with a lung shot.

Our defense will be brutal. Think "Baltimore Ravens" on the hardwood. We will earn the nickname "VOL-TECH" I can promise you. I dont want anyone to get stabbed or anything, but if we happen to get some Chicago players that wear brass knuckles, I'm cool with that.

Timeouts? I wont call any. I have more important crap to do at home so lets hurry this crap along.



Payment:

Yall dont mail me a check. I want cash only. You can hand it to me face to face. Hell, put it in a Wal Mart sack for all I care, just make sure its all there. I'll take 75% of 3 mil up front. Sounds like a lot, I know, but hey, times are tight know what I'm sayin? I want the last of it delivered by the cheerleaders and dance team.

Lastly, I'm only doing interviews with Clay Travis if he agrees to write half his articles about me, and the other half about how much Alabama sucks. One word about any other program and you can forget it. Also, there's not gonna be any of this "meet the coach night" or "open gym with the players". The players and I are not your friends.

See yall Wednesday to sign the papers and get my free orange jacket. I'm 42 long and that thing better have a Fila logo on it somewhere.

You're welcome.
 
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