Have a dilema

#27
#27
Don't rock the boat. Unless your wife feels exactly the same, AND she does not care if her friendship with the guys wife cools or even stops. One of those options has a high probability. Your wife's friends are important, whether or not you can be friends with the spouse.

My wife has a work friend who's pretty much like that.
He just buried his father after paying for both parents to be in one of the best nursing homes in the area. His mom is 92 now and spry.
Point is, you really don't know their financial obligations, no matter how much they earn. Let it be, for the sake of your wife having a real friend if that's what she wants. That's much more important.
 
#28
#28
Thanks everyone, I appreciate your insight. I'm gonna scale back what I bring and kinda scale back the frequency we hang out. He has plenty of $$ and tries to be a new character in fast and furious series.... Spends a lot on what's important to him.

Miss good solid southerners
 
#29
#29
VolStrom said:
When I used to do these type of things, a cook out assumed that people brought their own steak to cook and there would be an assortment of side dishes that everyone shared. Everyone's assumptions are different, so I would be clear the next time who is supplying what.
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Where do you live? As a guest of a cookout, bringing your own steak or another type of meat just seems like an alien idea to me. I'm from the South, and every cookout I've ever been to, the only thing guests bring are side dishes, and maybe refreshments. I'm not saying my way is the right way, I'm just saying that's the only way I know.

In fact, most people around these parts would consider it rude if I was to invite them to a cookout, yet ask them to supply their own steaks.
 
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#30
#30
ainge10heisman said:
Where do you live? As a guest of a cookout, bringing your own steak or another type of meat just seems like an alien idea to me. I'm from the South, and every cookout I've ever been to, the only thing guests bring are side dishes, and maybe refreshments. I'm not saying my way is the right way, I'm just saying that's the only way I know.

In fact, most people around these parts would consider it rude if I was to invite them to a cookout, yet ask them to supply their own steaks.
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I agree. I can't imagine inviting somebody over and then saying "ok, be sure to remember to pick up a steak.,"
 
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#31
#31
GAVol said:
I agree. I can't imagine inviting somebody over and then saying "ok, be sure to remember to pick up a steak.,"
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I get it if someone easily can, but don't. But then, again, in these situations it's more about your spouse's friendship than that with the skinflint. Sorta like your wife's sister marries a guy who turns out like that. For the sake of the sisters, have a few beers and talk sports.

I had a high school friend who was left some beautiful flat lake property that had been part his granpap's pastures. He sold enough to built a great lake house and he or his wife invited us down all the time.. and that was the summertime place to be. Bunch of boats tied off there every weekend.

They never had to provide food for anyone but their own family. We never expected them to.

It really depends on the situation.
 
#33
#33
I'd have to see pics of the wife to be sure but I still think the wife swap would be an acceptable compromise.
 
#34
#34
Just because he claims he makes good money doesnt mean he keeps it - you never know what goes on in someone elses life - hell living in Vegas he could be dropping money at the casinos and not telling the wife -- happens with problem gamblers all the time, then again maybe the wife gambles (lots of women are hooked on it)
 
#36
#36
ainge10heisman said:
Where do you live? As a guest of a cookout, bringing your own steak or another type of meat just seems like an alien idea to me. I'm from the South, and every cookout I've ever been to, the only thing guests bring are side dishes, and maybe refreshments. I'm not saying my way is the right way, I'm just saying that's the only way I know.

In fact, most people around these parts would consider it rude if I was to invite them to a cookout, yet ask them to supply their own steaks.
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I agree 100% with this post. I guess I was always taught, if you're invited to a BBQ, bring what you're drinking and a side dish or 2. Oh well, I'll just start eating prior to going over there
 
#37
#37
508mikey said:
Just because he claims he makes good money doesnt mean he keeps it - you never know what goes on in someone elses life - hell living in Vegas he could be dropping money at the casinos and not telling the wife -- happens with problem gamblers all the time, then again maybe the wife gambles (lots of women are hooked on it)
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He spends a lot on his car, think Fast and Furious. I'm not really into cars, meaning I don't work on them. I'm the gambler, not him. By the way. can someone loan me $20
 
#38
#38
utvolpj said:
You hang out with the husbands of your wife's friends. It's just what you do so saying something to her likely won't get you very far. It's why there's sports to discuss and beer to drink

I would ask why the dollar figure seems to be so important. Not sure I've ever compared based on the money spent for food. Everyone entertains in their own way
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Yeah, not sure I would get bent out of shape over that. I would be more upset about having to go over and spend time with them period. I suppose my expectations would already be low anyways.
 
#39
#39
Mtntrout said:
Ask what you should bring. He didn't tell you to drop 120 on seafood. Could he have only cooked 3 steaks because with your stuff added there was plenty of food?

When you host, request them to bring something specific or don't hold the dip against them. You know there is little chance this is a willful slight. Take control if it bothers you. At least you'll find out for sure if it is willful or not.
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Yep...
 
#40
#40
The guy's obviously a douche. If I was grilling and someone brought food over to be grilled I'd throw it on and have another beer and some conversation.
 
#41
#41
Carl Pickens said:
The guy's obviously a douche. If I was grilling and someone brought food over to be grilled I'd throw it on and have another beer and some conversation.
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What if each of those little steaks were Kobe, or even just expensive cuts of a good local butcher's beef, grilled badly. I've had what was supposed to be really good Colorado Black Angus sent for Christmas and by time I ruined it in a black iron skillet, I might as well have had cheap meat from Kroger.

Snake River Farms Kobe Rib-Eye Steaks, Set of 4
$219.95.

Hmmm... Really, I would just eat first, be cordial, talk sports and let the wife have her friend.
 
#42
#42
ainge10heisman said:
Where do you live? As a guest of a cookout, bringing your own steak or another type of meat just seems like an alien idea to me. I'm from the South, and every cookout I've ever been to, the only thing guests bring are side dishes, and maybe refreshments. I'm not saying my way is the right way, I'm just saying that's the only way I know.

In fact, most people around these parts would consider it rude if I was to invite them to a cookout, yet ask them to supply their own steaks.
Click to expand...

The reason it seems weird to me is that the person on the grill is the person living in that house. In that same vein, the person who provides the steaks grills the steaks. I'd think it'd be weird grilling my own steak on some other guy's grill, but I'd also be hesitant at all times that the dude grilling the steak I bought would be ruining MY DAMN STEAK
 
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#43
#43
This thread has been a pleasant relief from the recent heated political discussion.

That being said, who splits steaks up at a cook out? Now, my wife may choose to cut half of one or something but I can't imagine cooking less than the number of guests.
 
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#45
#45
I hate cook outs. I hate having them. I hate attending them.

It's funny I my 20s I was very social and enjoyed such activities. Then in my 30s it became a chore to go to those same functions. My wife says I'm good at small talk but I really don't enjoy it at all.
 
#46
#46
If you're hard up for money for whatever reason you don't host a grill out period. That being said, only cooking 3 steaks for 6 people is unorthodox. Maybe he's a douche, maybe plans changed at the last minute, maybe like someone else mentioned he figured between the steak, bacon wrapped shrimp, and mussels he felt the need to make the steak cuts the same size as the rest of the proteins. Was he aware ahead of time that you were bringing extra food?

Personally, I don't care who the guy is I'd have to ask him what his plan was or what he was thinking. When I see stupid happening I HAVE to question it.
 
#47
#47
guess, I'm like the majority on here, I can't imagine, not cooking enough steaks for the number of guest,,instead of splitting 6 steaks into 3, he could have gone with any number of other options, of chicken, or pork, to ensure that 6 adults had enough food to eat.

I would have brought it up,
 
#48
#48
kiddiedoc said:
This thread has been a pleasant relief from the recent heated political discussion.

That being said, who splits steaks up at a cook out? Now, my wife may choose to cut half of one or something but I can't imagine cooking less than the number of guests.
Click to expand...

Always have enough or more than enough
 
#49
#49
Speaking of steaks, i went to pick some ribeyes up on vacation, it was like 9:30 at night and Publix was out so they offered to take an order and cut them for me the next day when they were delivered.

I know **** about stuff like that so he asked me what size and I asked what he recommended. He said he usually cut them 1 1/4" so I was like ok sounds good. Went to pick them up the next day and it was like getting 4 roasts - $85. Some dang good eating tho.
 
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