Why is it that women can't handle stress as well as men??

#1
g8terh8ter_eric

g8terh8ter_eric

No Disassemble!
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#1
I don't understand this, maybe some of the women or more experienced married men on here can give me an insight. She calls it stress, and I call it life, yet I don't make myself miserable in my head because of it either. I love my wife with all my heart, but this is probably the most frustrating thing I have ever had to deal with to this point in our marriage, because she thinks it only happens to her, or so that's the way she presents it.

:cray:
 
#2
#2
According to Scientific American: women actually handle stress better than men.
 
#4
#4
PowerT83 said:
According to Scientific American: women actually handle stress better than men.
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I think that's BS honestly. I think it all depends on the person and their personality. I have a very low stress level, but a high ceiling for it, mainly because of my faith.
 
#6
#6
I wish I was a woman whisperer. From what I can tell they're all crazy and have their own quirks that are designed to drive a man mad.
 
#8
#8
g8terh8ter_eric said:
I think that's BS honestly. I think it all depends on the person and their personality. I have a very low stress level, but a high ceiling for it, mainly because of my faith.
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Hey, Eric, if it all depended on the person and their personality, then why did you phrase the thread: women can't handle stress as well as men??
 
#9
#9
Sabanocchio said:
Hey, Eric, if it all depended on the person and their personality, then why did you phrase the thread: women can't handle stress as well as men??
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Because I want the emotional side. I don't like to get all emotional that much, except on the romantic side. I don't like all that negative crap that some people dwell on. I just want to know the emotional side really, from a woman that's not my wife. Sometimes getting that outside opinion helps you see what your missing.
 
#10
#10
Women process emotions and reactions outwardly, where men do the exact opposite and process it inwardly. Present the same situation to a male and female, and watch the difference in reactions. Women automatically process it outwardly with words and body language, looking for response from you (men) to agree with them. When you don't follow suit, they take that as "you don't care about what I care about", etc etc. Which increases the level of their stress.

Where men, take the same situation and process it inwardly, perhaps not even giving much more than a facial expression at first. Does it mean you don't care? No. It means you choose to process it differently. Its technically not that she deals with stress "worse" than you, its that she deals with it differently. Its just the difference in sexes. A difference that drives the male sex up the frickin' wall.

If you're wondering what the origin of this rant is, I'm married to a marriage and family therapist.

She would be glad to give you the scoop, but you might get billed. :)
 
#11
#11
Hardwood_fanatic said:
Women process emotions and reactions outwardly, where men do the exact opposite and process it inwardly. Present the same situation to a male and female, and watch the difference in reactions. Women automatically process it outwardly with words and body language, looking for response from you (men) to agree with them. When you don't follow suit, they take that as "you don't care about what I care about", etc etc. Which increases the level of their stress.

Where men, take the same situation and process it inwardly, perhaps not even giving much more than a facial expression at first. Does it mean you don't care? No. It means you choose to process it differently. Its technically not that she deals with stress "worse" than you, its that she deals with it differently. Its just the difference in sexes. A difference that drives the male sex up the frickin' wall.

If you're wondering what the origin of this rant is, I'm married to a marriage and family therapist.

She would be glad to give you the scoop, but you might get billed. :)
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Nice. I knew she processed differently, but she keeps trying to convert me to do the same as me. If I did that though, I would be in the frickin' mental institute though. :)
 
#13
#13
g8terh8ter_eric said:
Nice. I knew she processed differently, but she keeps trying to convert me to do the same as me. If I did that though, I would be in the frickin' mental institute though. :)
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Yeah. Well, that never stops. I'm lucky because my wife is cognisant of the fact that she is doing it, and then slowly backs down from the ledge.

I went through the same thing you are at one time though, and what it came down to was having to express the fact that we really don't process things the same, and that its not a matter of "choice". Its the way both sexes are programmed.

Some say that you should be there for her to vent with her stress (which is true), but there is a line that can be crossed where her stress relief takes a toll on you, which cannot happen because its unhealthy for you both.

Somehow, you just have to find a way to communicate those things so that she understands what it does to you, and the fact that you care just as much as she does.... just in a different way. Just talking and communicating is a great start. They want to know that you're at least concerned about a situation, and don't just blow it off with "thats life" (even though it is..). Give them the gratification that what they are saying is valid. Once they have that, they are more willing to listen to the other side of the story.

It doesn't stop her from doing it, but it helps the process go much smoother AFTER she has said her peace. Hope that helps somewhat. :eek:k:
 
#15
#15
Lexapro or Paxil may help. Now you just have to decide which one of you is going to take it.
 
#17
#17
Next time she gets stressed out tell her she'd feel much better after making you a sammich!

Warning: Only do this if you are ready to die or get divorced.
 
#18
#18
KB5252 said:
Next time she gets stressed out tell her she'd feel much better after making you a sammich!

Warning: Only do this if you are ready to die or get divorced.
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I always prefer the "You will feel much better after you shut up and rub my back" approach
 
#20
#20
So what Hardwood Fanatic is saying, in short... is that men are an island, while women don't even like to go to the restroom by themselves.
 
#21
#21
IBlvNTmWrk said:
So what Hardwood Fanatic is saying, in short... is that men are an island, while women don't even like to go to the restroom by themselves.
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I've never been in a womens restroom, but I have never found anything remotely frightening in the mens restroom that I would need an escort.
 
#22
#22
I think it all depends on the person really. Me being a female, imo women do handle stress better than men. Or, maybe it's because women generally have more stress in their lives than men do, what with trying to raise kids, be a good wife, hold down a job, etc. Not that men don't have these things too, but I think women just feel the stress from all of these things more, especially single mothers. That is a hard thing to do, and I say this from experience because I've been in that situation before. We all have stress in our lives, but some people just handle it way better than others.
 
#23
#23
g8terh8ter_eric said:
I don't understand this, maybe some of the women or more experienced married men on here can give me an insight. She calls it stress, and I call it life, yet I don't make myself miserable in my head because of it either. I love my wife with all my heart, but this is probably the most frustrating thing I have ever had to deal with to this point in our marriage, because she thinks it only happens to her, or so that's the way she presents it.

:cray:
Click to expand...

so I see exactly what you are saying...My wife whom I love does some very similair things. I, like you, am extremely laid back and stress free due to my faith. My faith has a strong faith, too.

You can tell it in the tone of her voice more than anything else. Her tone can get so exasperated with the slightest bit of stress. I am a fixer (I prefer to fix things). So when something bothers her there is always something wrong with the way I try to fix something therefore I have to just let her ride it out then fix it.
 
#25
#25
g8terh8ter_eric said:
Nice. I knew she processed differently, but she keeps trying to convert me to do the same as me. If I did that though, I would be in the frickin' mental institute though. :)
Click to expand...

Women scream all the time about being treated equal and not looked down upon by men. And then when they throw stress-fits because of the smallest things and you call them out for it it's always "I'm a woman, you're a man we are different".
 
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