Wedding Gown

#1

Jasongivm6

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#1
A woman married three times walked into a bridal shop one day and told the sales clerk that she was looking for a wedding gown for her fourth wedding. "Of course, madam," replied the sales clerk, "exactly what type and color dress are you looking for?"

The bride to be said: "A long frilly white dress with a veil."

The sales clerk hesitated a bit, then said, "Please don't take this the wrong way, but gowns of that nature are considered more appropriate for brides who are being married the first time - for those who are a bit more innocent, if you know what I mean? Perhaps ivory or sky blue would be nice?"

"Well," replied the customer, a little peeved at the clerk's directness, "I can assure you that a white gown would be quite appropriate. Believe it or not, despite all my marriages, I remain as innocent as any first-time bride. You see, my first husband was so excited about our wedding; he died as we were checking into our hotel. My second husband and I got into such a terrible fight in the Limo on our way to our honeymoon that we had that wedding annulled immediately and never spoke to each other again."

"What about your third husband?" asked the sales clerk.

"Oh", she said, "He was a Crimson Tide fan and all he did for five years was sit on the side of the bed and tell me how good it was going to be".
 
#8
#8
That offends me for no good reason.


TuskALoosa and RevRollTide are walking toward each other on their dirt road. Rev has a bag in his hand. TuskALoosa asks, "Hey Rev, what you got in that bag?" Rev replies, "Just a couple of chickens." TuskALoosa then asks, "If I guess how many are in there, will you give me one?" Rev says, "Shoot, I'll give you both of em'."
 
#10
#10
TuskALoosa and RevRollTide are walking toward each other on their dirt road. Rev has a bag in his hand. TuskALoosa asks, "Hey Rev, what you got in that bag?" Rev replies, "Just a couple of chickens." TuskALoosa then asks, "If I guess how many are in there, will you give me one?" Rev says, "Shoot, I'll give you both of em'."


Uhhhhh, three... No.... Four.
 

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