DocVol
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(Sung to the tune of Piano Man by Billy Joel)
Well its 9 AM on a Sunday
The Athletic Director shuffles in
Theres a loud man interviewing
Who just wants to be head coach again
Coach opened up a big binder
that was filled to the brim with his plays
It had dives, whams, and sweeps- and blitzes and sneaks
And the one where you dive at their legs
Loss loss loss loss loss loss loss, loss loss win win loss, loss loss loss
________________________________________
His name is Gregory Schiano
And hes just what the Vols need to break through
Hes big and hes scruffy, and he drove over a kids Huffy
While working at The OSU
Sing us a song, youre the Schiano man
Sing us a song tonight
You never were charged with a felony
But you couldve been a bit more contrite
Loss loss loss loss loss loss loss, loss loss win win loss, loss loss loss
________________________________________
Now Greg never won the Big East conference,
He almost came close once or twice.
He cried like a baby, and kept losing to Navy
And then blamed it all on Ray Rice
But hes paid his dues as a coordinator
He leads The Ohio State D
His egos humungous and he lives in Columbus
And he thinks he can coach SEC
Sing us a song, youre the Schiano man
Sing us a song tonight
You never were charged with a felony
But you couldve been a bit more contrite
________________________________________
But Tennesseans brought out there pitch forks
Volunteer fans said he wouldnt suffice
He had too much baggage, and that bugged Clay Travis
Whose children are drowning in lice
Well Schiano had singed all his paperwork
And he gave his poor wife a big smooch
But how could he know hed be jettisoned
After lasting less time then the Mooch
Sing us a song youre the Schiano Man,
You wouldve turned around Tennessee
That locker room culture can be remedied,
With elbow grease, staph, and gangrene.
Well its 9 AM on a Sunday
The Athletic Director shuffles in
Theres a loud man interviewing
Who just wants to be head coach again
Coach opened up a big binder
that was filled to the brim with his plays
It had dives, whams, and sweeps- and blitzes and sneaks
And the one where you dive at their legs
Loss loss loss loss loss loss loss, loss loss win win loss, loss loss loss
________________________________________
His name is Gregory Schiano
And hes just what the Vols need to break through
Hes big and hes scruffy, and he drove over a kids Huffy
While working at The OSU
Sing us a song, youre the Schiano man
Sing us a song tonight
You never were charged with a felony
But you couldve been a bit more contrite
Loss loss loss loss loss loss loss, loss loss win win loss, loss loss loss
________________________________________
Now Greg never won the Big East conference,
He almost came close once or twice.
He cried like a baby, and kept losing to Navy
And then blamed it all on Ray Rice
But hes paid his dues as a coordinator
He leads The Ohio State D
His egos humungous and he lives in Columbus
And he thinks he can coach SEC
Sing us a song, youre the Schiano man
Sing us a song tonight
You never were charged with a felony
But you couldve been a bit more contrite
________________________________________
But Tennesseans brought out there pitch forks
Volunteer fans said he wouldnt suffice
He had too much baggage, and that bugged Clay Travis
Whose children are drowning in lice
Well Schiano had singed all his paperwork
And he gave his poor wife a big smooch
But how could he know hed be jettisoned
After lasting less time then the Mooch
Sing us a song youre the Schiano Man,
You wouldve turned around Tennessee
That locker room culture can be remedied,
With elbow grease, staph, and gangrene.
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