TroyCG
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<< Last update: June 11, 2005 at 11:55 PM
C.J.: If ever a whiz there was ...
C.J., Star Tribune
June 12, 2005 CJ0612
Troubled Viking Onterrio Smith has been unmasked as an original pee brain.
Smith, suspended last week by the NFL for violating its substance-abuse policy a third time, was cited for urinating in a Block E elevator on May 1, 2004, about 2:20 a.m. This was more than a year before the running back would be detained at Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport because his carry-on luggage contained a white powder that turned out to be dried urine that comes with a gizmo for circumventing drug tests marketed as "The Original Whizzinator."
According to Minneapolis police officer Michael Casey's report, he was working off-duty when told about a male suspect apparently planning to urinate in the elevator. Casey contacted a security guy who was monitoring the video surveillance system. "The security officer observed ... urinating in the corner of the elevator," Casey's report states. Informed that the urinating subject was in a car outside Le Meridien hotel, Casey went out to talk with Smith, who was in the driver's seat. "There were three other persons in the vehicle. I asked [Smith] why he urinated in the elevator. He asked me if I 'was for real.' I told him to step out of his vehicle."
Instead of showing Smith a restroom where he could wash his hands, Casey took him to review the tape: "Several females were in the elevator. They reacted by fleeing the general area where he was urinating. I inspected the elevator. I found a large urine-soiled area in the left corner."
The bad news is that Smith has got a thing or two to learn about truly thrilling the ladies. The good news: Now the NFL knows where to get a pure Onterrio urine specimen.
On Thursday a police clerk said that no charges were brought.
On the way to documenting this case, I came upon another court matter with Smith's distinctive name on it. He is scheduled to make an appearance at Hennepin County's Ridgedale outpost on July 15 to deal with a charge of "driving after suspension." He should have no trouble being prompt for court appearances, since he's got nothing but time on his hands this season.
Funny as this is, it seems like getting cited for public urination would be a pathetic cry for help by this handsome, misguided athlete. That question was put to Smith's agent, Doug Hendrickson, in two voice-mails. Have yet to hear back. >>
:lolup:
C.J.: If ever a whiz there was ...
C.J., Star Tribune
June 12, 2005 CJ0612
Troubled Viking Onterrio Smith has been unmasked as an original pee brain.
Smith, suspended last week by the NFL for violating its substance-abuse policy a third time, was cited for urinating in a Block E elevator on May 1, 2004, about 2:20 a.m. This was more than a year before the running back would be detained at Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport because his carry-on luggage contained a white powder that turned out to be dried urine that comes with a gizmo for circumventing drug tests marketed as "The Original Whizzinator."
According to Minneapolis police officer Michael Casey's report, he was working off-duty when told about a male suspect apparently planning to urinate in the elevator. Casey contacted a security guy who was monitoring the video surveillance system. "The security officer observed ... urinating in the corner of the elevator," Casey's report states. Informed that the urinating subject was in a car outside Le Meridien hotel, Casey went out to talk with Smith, who was in the driver's seat. "There were three other persons in the vehicle. I asked [Smith] why he urinated in the elevator. He asked me if I 'was for real.' I told him to step out of his vehicle."
Instead of showing Smith a restroom where he could wash his hands, Casey took him to review the tape: "Several females were in the elevator. They reacted by fleeing the general area where he was urinating. I inspected the elevator. I found a large urine-soiled area in the left corner."
The bad news is that Smith has got a thing or two to learn about truly thrilling the ladies. The good news: Now the NFL knows where to get a pure Onterrio urine specimen.
On Thursday a police clerk said that no charges were brought.
On the way to documenting this case, I came upon another court matter with Smith's distinctive name on it. He is scheduled to make an appearance at Hennepin County's Ridgedale outpost on July 15 to deal with a charge of "driving after suspension." He should have no trouble being prompt for court appearances, since he's got nothing but time on his hands this season.
Funny as this is, it seems like getting cited for public urination would be a pathetic cry for help by this handsome, misguided athlete. That question was put to Smith's agent, Doug Hendrickson, in two voice-mails. Have yet to hear back. >>
:lolup:
