New SAT Section Tests Ability To Pay Tuition

[OrangeEmpire]

New SAT Section Tests Ability To Pay Tuition | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

PRINCETON, NJ—The Educational Testing Service, developer of the Scholastic Aptitude Test, is creating a new section on the standardized college-entry test that for the first time addresses a crucial facet of students' capabilities: their family's potential to make full tuition payments.
"We carefully screen responses to questions such as 'What is the number represented by x if x=price of your wristwatch subtracted from $10,000,'" test writer Anthony Clausewitz said. "And in our new, expanded essay section, we ask test-takers to solve disputes among servants, describe what it was like to attend their first polo match, and identify the important settlor and beneficiary characters in a fictional trust fund."
Beginning in 2008, valet parking attendants at all SAT-testing sites will offer automatic Ivy League admission to students who arrive in luxury automobiles.

Thoughts?

 

[lawgator1]

I am assuming that this is left over from the April 1 drawer.

 

[OrangeEmpire]

I am assuming that this is left over from the April 1 drawer.

Huh?

It is the onion.

:whistling:

 

[BigPapaVol]

Huh?

It is the onion.

:whistling:

He's apparently above The Onion.

 

[OrangeEmpire]

He's apparently above The Onion.

Must be.........:ermm:

 

[lawgator1]

I love the Onion.