Never question a drunk.....

#1

GIVEHIM-6

Mayberrys Pride
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Jul 6, 2004
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#1
don't read the punchline first or you will ruin the laugh.


Never Question a Drunk



A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected:

A half-gallon of 2% milk,
A carton of eggs,
A quart of orange juice,
A head of romaine lettuce,
A 2 lb. can of coffee,
And a 1 lb. package of bacon.

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk
standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the
cashier.

While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated,
"You must be single."

The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by
the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single.

She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly
unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital
status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know
what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?"




















The drunk replied, "'Cause you're ugly."
 
#5
#5
A drunk walks into a bar in Alaska and is hitting on all the women. A bear walks in and comes up next to the drunk. The drunk puts his arm around the bear and slurs "Hey baby, how 'bout a drink?" The bear swats him off the barstool with one blow and mauls him around a little bit and leaves. The drunk staggers to his feet and says "Buy a woman a fur coat and she thinks she owns the world."
 

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