MadWorld
Caligula would grin.
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2015
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Typical Alabama Football Fan
38 year grandfather of 6. He met his wife at the family reunion (see below).
The only reason they call it Bama is because saying "Bama" with or without teeth sounds the same.
He owns 14 shirts, thirteen of which have to do with Alabama football. Ten of those shirts list the number of mythical national titles his favorite team has "won".
The most important aspect of his life is that EVERYONE must know that Alabama is his favorite team at every moment of his life. He thinks about his more than he thinks of sex. How do I proclaim my fandom to the world? His truck, his trailer, his clothes, his pets, his tattoos, his parole papers - all of them must include a reference to his Bama fandom.
As soon as he gets finished relieving his bowels in the morning from his outhouse, he yells "Roll Tide".
As he is making love to his 2nd cousin (see above), aka his wife, he yells "Roll Tide Roll".
He once ran a 4.8 in the 40 for his high school football team when he was 23 years old. The next day he ran a 4.2 out the back door of his granny's house because his grandpa found him "peekin' through the bathroom keyhole" at granny.
While shopping at the Piggly Wiggly he hears the song "Dixie Land Delight" over the store speakers. He immediately stands at attention with his hand over his heart. At the end of the song, he instinctively yells "Roll Tide". Little does he know that this song is about Tennessee.
He attends Alabama First Church of Christ (Bless him). When the offering is passed around each Sunday, there is an offering plate for the Lord, and a separate offering plate for "Nick Saban" to help next recruiting cycle. "Roll Tide".
When he attends a funeral for a fellow Bama fan, he will substitute his "Big Al" car flag for the "Funeral" flag during the procession. Of course at the end of the funeral, he yells "Roll Tide" along with the 45 other members of the deceased family.
He can't add or subtract; but they sure can multiply when it comes to National championships and first cousins.
Fully half of all Bama fans have a dog, cat or more likely a son or daughter named Bear or Bryant. In 10 years you will see a bunch of 8-9 year old named Tua running around. Now you will understand why.
38 year grandfather of 6. He met his wife at the family reunion (see below).
The only reason they call it Bama is because saying "Bama" with or without teeth sounds the same.
He owns 14 shirts, thirteen of which have to do with Alabama football. Ten of those shirts list the number of mythical national titles his favorite team has "won".
The most important aspect of his life is that EVERYONE must know that Alabama is his favorite team at every moment of his life. He thinks about his more than he thinks of sex. How do I proclaim my fandom to the world? His truck, his trailer, his clothes, his pets, his tattoos, his parole papers - all of them must include a reference to his Bama fandom.
As soon as he gets finished relieving his bowels in the morning from his outhouse, he yells "Roll Tide".
As he is making love to his 2nd cousin (see above), aka his wife, he yells "Roll Tide Roll".
He once ran a 4.8 in the 40 for his high school football team when he was 23 years old. The next day he ran a 4.2 out the back door of his granny's house because his grandpa found him "peekin' through the bathroom keyhole" at granny.
While shopping at the Piggly Wiggly he hears the song "Dixie Land Delight" over the store speakers. He immediately stands at attention with his hand over his heart. At the end of the song, he instinctively yells "Roll Tide". Little does he know that this song is about Tennessee.
He attends Alabama First Church of Christ (Bless him). When the offering is passed around each Sunday, there is an offering plate for the Lord, and a separate offering plate for "Nick Saban" to help next recruiting cycle. "Roll Tide".
When he attends a funeral for a fellow Bama fan, he will substitute his "Big Al" car flag for the "Funeral" flag during the procession. Of course at the end of the funeral, he yells "Roll Tide" along with the 45 other members of the deceased family.
He can't add or subtract; but they sure can multiply when it comes to National championships and first cousins.
Fully half of all Bama fans have a dog, cat or more likely a son or daughter named Bear or Bryant. In 10 years you will see a bunch of 8-9 year old named Tua running around. Now you will understand why.
