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How did you overcome a tough period in life?
- Thread starter Adam2014
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I dealt with something more tragic than I could have ever imagined. It was ten steps beyond what we had considered as the "worst case scenario."
I went with my kids to Mane Support, which is an organization that provides therapy (mostly for kids) that involves horses. They brush the horses and walk them around while slowly opening up to a therapist. Months later I realized that I hadn't dealt with it myself, and I started going blind with ocular migraines caused by stress and depression. I got put on meds and haven't had one since. Seek professional help is the go-to here, for sure.
I went with my kids to Mane Support, which is an organization that provides therapy (mostly for kids) that involves horses. They brush the horses and walk them around while slowly opening up to a therapist. Months later I realized that I hadn't dealt with it myself, and I started going blind with ocular migraines caused by stress and depression. I got put on meds and haven't had one since. Seek professional help is the go-to here, for sure.
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@Adam2014 bumping this again.
I just had to take a "me" weekend. Was feeling beat down and off. Had to say no to my family, which never feels good, but I am much better now.
I just had to take a "me" weekend. Was feeling beat down and off. Had to say no to my family, which never feels good, but I am much better now.
I appreciate everyone bumping this thread. I neglect my notifications and I am sorry about that. I will give an update on where I am at. Some of it is good and some of it is bad.
One of the significant things that was leading to my depression when I made this post originally was my job. I was working as a research meteorologist in missile defense and I hated it. It was a combination of things and I do not want to give it any more energy than it deserves.
Around Christmas time, I saw my only two options as making a change or putting a bullet through my skull (I apologize for how graphic this is, but it gives you an idea of where I was at). Most people told me growing up that I would be a great TV meteorologist, but I always thought that was below me. I finally decided to listen to people, so I reached out to WAFF in Huntsville, AL to see if they had any work I could do.
They needed a weekend meteorologist to fill in for someone who was on maternity leave. I took it. And from late January to late March I worked two jobs 7 days a week. I loved the tv job so much that I quit my other job and starting searching for a TV job full time. I also lost 20 pounds or so which is all good things.
I took a full time position at WKBN in Youngstown, OH which a lot of people scoff at because "It's Ohio" but its a great place. The people are great, the weather is interesting, and the golf is amazing. Things are going better than they were, so that is good.
However, I have slipped back into some depression for some reason and it has been bad lately. I have been drinking more and gaining some of the weight back. My apartment is in disarray and I cannot get a date to save my life. I made an appointment with a psychiatrist today, so hopefully we can come up with a plan for me to get better.
All-in-all I am proud of myself for making such a big change in my life, but I am going to have to keep switching things up to continue improvement.
Once again, thank you everyone for asking about me. I really appreciate it.
One of the significant things that was leading to my depression when I made this post originally was my job. I was working as a research meteorologist in missile defense and I hated it. It was a combination of things and I do not want to give it any more energy than it deserves.
Around Christmas time, I saw my only two options as making a change or putting a bullet through my skull (I apologize for how graphic this is, but it gives you an idea of where I was at). Most people told me growing up that I would be a great TV meteorologist, but I always thought that was below me. I finally decided to listen to people, so I reached out to WAFF in Huntsville, AL to see if they had any work I could do.
They needed a weekend meteorologist to fill in for someone who was on maternity leave. I took it. And from late January to late March I worked two jobs 7 days a week. I loved the tv job so much that I quit my other job and starting searching for a TV job full time. I also lost 20 pounds or so which is all good things.
I took a full time position at WKBN in Youngstown, OH which a lot of people scoff at because "It's Ohio" but its a great place. The people are great, the weather is interesting, and the golf is amazing. Things are going better than they were, so that is good.
However, I have slipped back into some depression for some reason and it has been bad lately. I have been drinking more and gaining some of the weight back. My apartment is in disarray and I cannot get a date to save my life. I made an appointment with a psychiatrist today, so hopefully we can come up with a plan for me to get better.
All-in-all I am proud of myself for making such a big change in my life, but I am going to have to keep switching things up to continue improvement.
Once again, thank you everyone for asking about me. I really appreciate it.
Those weekends are necessary. I am lucky that I do not live close to my family anymore.
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VolFaninFla
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Glad to hear from you and despite the bad, there is a lot of good there.
The best advice I can give you is just try to be present in every moment when you feel the darkness come. Our minds are our own worst enemies. We'll be in our heads trying to destroy ourselves, editorializing the past or fretting about our future or just locked into some feeling we can't explain, when really, we should just be enjoying the cool air coming through the vent above us. It's kind of some hippy ****, but it works for me. I just try to notice my breath, or sounds (like the humming of the computer tower), or focus on what my toes or knees are feeling. Maybe most helpful of all, it's a way to curb binge eating. I'm the worst and I'll just wolf down snacks. Like say, coconut candied cashews. 5 at a time I'll be throwing them down, and then I'll catch myself and realize I'm not even enjoying them. I'm just consuming them. I'm masking something else (boredom, anxiety) with this snack like it's a drug. When I become aware, I eat one at a time and focus on thoroughly enjoying each one, and then I'm not up 3 lbs at the end of a weekend.
Figure out what works for you because these presence exercises help you get into the moment and just be there.
The best advice I can give you is just try to be present in every moment when you feel the darkness come. Our minds are our own worst enemies. We'll be in our heads trying to destroy ourselves, editorializing the past or fretting about our future or just locked into some feeling we can't explain, when really, we should just be enjoying the cool air coming through the vent above us. It's kind of some hippy ****, but it works for me. I just try to notice my breath, or sounds (like the humming of the computer tower), or focus on what my toes or knees are feeling. Maybe most helpful of all, it's a way to curb binge eating. I'm the worst and I'll just wolf down snacks. Like say, coconut candied cashews. 5 at a time I'll be throwing them down, and then I'll catch myself and realize I'm not even enjoying them. I'm just consuming them. I'm masking something else (boredom, anxiety) with this snack like it's a drug. When I become aware, I eat one at a time and focus on thoroughly enjoying each one, and then I'm not up 3 lbs at the end of a weekend.
Figure out what works for you because these presence exercises help you get into the moment and just be there.
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If I could look at it objectively, then I am sure I would agree. That is very difficult for me, though. I also forgot to mention that I moved to a place where I do not know anyone. That is a common theme in my life. I have done it three times now and I am only 26. I made awesome friends each time, though.
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Hey Adam,
If you want to meet new people, check out this link.
Find Social Events & Groups in Youngstown, OH
You can start your own meetup group there.
I met many of my friends on a divorce support meetup in 2008. I also joined a singles meetup group.
We ended up starting our own meetup group and named it Carpe Diem. We organized bike rides, restaurant outings, ball games, theater nights, concerts, etc.
Very effective way to meet people.
If you want to meet new people, check out this link.
Find Social Events & Groups in Youngstown, OH
You can start your own meetup group there.
I met many of my friends on a divorce support meetup in 2008. I also joined a singles meetup group.
We ended up starting our own meetup group and named it Carpe Diem. We organized bike rides, restaurant outings, ball games, theater nights, concerts, etc.
Very effective way to meet people.
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DocVOLiday and Adam2014
Keep on moving. I’ve had times I’ve wanted to curl up in a ball and never move again but I couldn’t. I will not stop, I will never let whatever it is that’s causing me grief, have a victory over me.
I thought I was incapable of feeling depressed but I wasn’t. I thought I was in the best place in my life when it started but it happened. It takes prayer, work and help from above and people you love to overcome things of this nature. And sometimes it takes professional help.
I know one thing for sure, everyone deals with their problems in different ways. But, I’m sure anyone will tell you that you have to face your fears to overcome them.
Jmo
I have one more thing to add. Never take the truth as a slight. Most people that tell you the truth are trying to help you. Especially your loved ones. It might be hard to hear sometimes but you need people to be honest with their feelings.
I know I’m adding more but I think this needs to be added.
There are times when the people you love the most will not know what to do. But, they love and they will worry about you. The people that love you unconditionally are the ones you need most in your life. And it is good to talk or converse with a complete stranger at times.
I feel like I’m rambling but I feel like this is what helped me.
I thought I was incapable of feeling depressed but I wasn’t. I thought I was in the best place in my life when it started but it happened. It takes prayer, work and help from above and people you love to overcome things of this nature. And sometimes it takes professional help.
I know one thing for sure, everyone deals with their problems in different ways. But, I’m sure anyone will tell you that you have to face your fears to overcome them.
Jmo
I have one more thing to add. Never take the truth as a slight. Most people that tell you the truth are trying to help you. Especially your loved ones. It might be hard to hear sometimes but you need people to be honest with their feelings.
I know I’m adding more but I think this needs to be added.
There are times when the people you love the most will not know what to do. But, they love and they will worry about you. The people that love you unconditionally are the ones you need most in your life. And it is good to talk or converse with a complete stranger at times.
I feel like I’m rambling but I feel like this is what helped me.
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Glad to hear it. I think your experience is similar to a lot of peoples, including mine, with the depression roller coaster. Some good, some bad. And yeah usually the bad days dont make sense.
One thing that has helped me was defining what was causing the issue. For me, mentally, it was that I wouldnt try, too shy, awkward, depressed, whatever. Especially when it came to women. So even though I strike out, I will at least put myself up to bat every once and a while. So even though I was still failing, I wasnt failing myself by not trying. I gave it a shot, she said no, such is life, i tried and i cant hold her opinion against her. Better than not trying.
One thing that has helped me was defining what was causing the issue. For me, mentally, it was that I wouldnt try, too shy, awkward, depressed, whatever. Especially when it came to women. So even though I strike out, I will at least put myself up to bat every once and a while. So even though I was still failing, I wasnt failing myself by not trying. I gave it a shot, she said no, such is life, i tried and i cant hold her opinion against her. Better than not trying.
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Glad to hear things are improved. Good also to see a psychiatrist but realize that most psychiatrists nowadays only manage medications and don’t do therapy or counseling.
Don’t get discouraged. Small backward change in mood is very common and expected. The key is to not let it spiral down continuously. Recognize it and take steps to get back in a positive direction. Good luck!! I’ve been in your shoes and it will get better.
Don’t get discouraged. Small backward change in mood is very common and expected. The key is to not let it spiral down continuously. Recognize it and take steps to get back in a positive direction. Good luck!! I’ve been in your shoes and it will get better.
You said your apt is in disarray - that can lead to depression - try cleaning it up and decorating it to your liking - its a sense of accomplishment - something nice to come home to every night
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Keep fighting my friend. I know that's easier said than done, and I say that as someone who has felt completely hopeless, totally different circumstances, but just saying I understand it's hard to keep fighting. Seems like I recall you saying you're not religious, and I don't mean to push anything on you at all. I will say this, next time you're feeling down, look up Jeremiah 29:11, and read it. Know that you have purpose, and believe that much. Hang in there, I'll be praying for you.
Well, I broke my second golf club of the year yesterday. I am just not in a good place mentally.
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