Florida Felons

#1
rexvol

rexvol

The Minister of Defense
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Apr 29, 2006
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#1
Hey LG, nice body of work...

Ranking the Florida Gator Arrests « Loser with Socks
1. After Jarvis “Puffy” Moss jumped up (Ganja increased his vertical by 18″) and salvaged the croc’s season against the Gamecocks by blocking a last second field goal attempt, it was revealed he to also failed a drug test during the summer as the clock ticked to zero. Guess what game he missed? The showdown between top ranked UF versus division 1AA Western Carolina.
2. Gator great, Marcus “Medicinal Puff” Thomas - a multiple drug test failure, pot and GHB. Gator fans tried to convince us all it was from the same test… then the truth came out, near the end of the season with his dismissal from the team. Moss and Thomas were both drafted by the Broncos. WTF was Shanahan thinking?
3. Baby Momma Slappin Avery Atkins. The alleged victim, Benerah Sanford, told police: She and Atkins argued Saturday on a drive to Atkins’ grandmother’s house. Atkins leaned over and punched her at least 13 times, and pushed her face against the car’s window while he conversed with relatives. Every time Sanford tried to exit the car, Atkins either punched her or stepped on the gas. When the pair finally arrived at Atkins’ home, she ran off and called the police.
Earlier this month, Atkins was found in a car in Daytona Beach with weed, gun and digital scales. To top it off, it was not his car. He had enrolled in UF in January with plans to “fight his way back to the cornerback slot.”
4. Brandon James a football player and Brandon Powell who coincidently is the basketball player who sucker punched the Vandy student in the back of the head [link], were found together in Gainesville with…. you guessed it: marijuana in the car during an undercover “buy bust”. One felony and one misdemeanor — purchase of a controlled substance and possession of >20 grams of marijuana — suspended indefinitely.
5. WR Riley Cooper smashed a windshield, welcome the perfect gater. And just who is Jasim Alidina? Adlina was the victim of Freshman Riley Cooper’s flailing haymaker through his car window. While Alidina survived the incident, remarkably unscathed, neither Cooper nor the car were as lucky. Cooper was taken to the Morton Plant Hospital.

6. Florida defensive back Dorian Munroe charged with felony for removal of parking boot and placing it in his trunk. This was later ironed out as expected as UF is thin at the corner. One felony — theft of a police metal parking boot from his car
7. At Da Club, Ronnie “The Rifleman” Wilson slaps some guy, then spits on him, then ends it by shooting at him, luckily police actually stepped in one time before he killed that guy. two felonies and one misdemeanor — gun in a parking lot near campus — suspended indefinitely
8. LB Dusty “Rhodes” Doe, pummels some dude (ala Channing the Chainsaw Crowder) in a Alaucha County vs. Pasco County gang fight (Reds vs. Crips style). Punishment? No suspension from Meyer. Doe to face the (Jaws intro theme) Leadership Committee. one misdemeanor — disorderly conduct for parking garage brawl
9. The 7-Man shower Self shooting gun incident, Gator players led by Dee Webb, Andre “Bubba” Caldwell and Reggie Lewis had a $60,000 SUV loaded with improperly registered AK’s and other machine guns… and they were all drunk while shooting at apartment windows for fun. Of course initially nobody took the blame and they all said they were in the shower (together) and that the gun must have shot itself… Gators went with the deniable plausibility angle when Dee Webb shot off his arsenal saying he had already declared for the draft, so he was no longer a Gator.
T10. Dallas “Bike Taker” Baker, steals a bike, but when cops questioned him, Dallas said, “heck man, I just thought the bike was ‘abandoned’”. The sophomore was issued a sworn complaint from UPD as an officer stopped Baker near Ben Hill Griffin Stadium (which is a great place to take a deuce). Baker said he was late for an appointment and picked up an abandoned bicycle. Misdemeanor!!!
T10. Linebacker Taurean Charles. A UF student said Charles touched her against her will, the sworn complaint issued by the university police department said. Charles allegedly slammed her on the bed and onto a computer desk, picked her up over his head and threw her down on her roommate’s bed, according to the complaint. Charles was later dismissed from the Florida team.
Who is worse? Florida or Montana? [link]
Honorable Mention
Nyan (Cap’n Stabbin) Boateng gets into a heated arguement with some chick, a knife fight breaks out, Nyan Dogg ends up bloodied on the floor, luckily he was still alive.
“Nyan has some issues he is dealing with, and in the meantime, he will not participate in any team activities,” Florida spokesman Steve McClain said.
​
WR Percy Harvin, the star of the 2006 recruiting class, is a guy who was banned from Virginia High School sports. Why? Because he slugged a ref and had been involved in numerous brawls.
Chris Rainey and other recruits brag about how many gifts and wads of cash they are getting from Gator Alumni/Boosters… Cash, Jewelry, and throwback jerseys. But he was just joking. Ha Ha Ha.
Joakim Noah swipes at Vandy cheerleader [link], and later confronts the Vandy coach! That will show her and him. They were gatorbait!
Two Gator linebackers Darryl Gresham Jr. and Jon Demps go up in smoke, Cheech and Chong style, suspended from team on National Signing Day. Suspension/dismissals free up crucial scholarships for incoming Blue Chip recruits. Linebacking now a concern.
The unknown 6′4″ 280 pounder. A University of Florida student claimed a Gator football player stole his beer keg from the back of his truck which was heavily damaged as his head hit it. The student had a knot on his head and his neck was slashed by a ring. This was reported to the police as per a story in the Florida Alligator. This story quickly vanished. The student got his keg back and continued scraping the paint out of the knot on his head (legend says that the student now has a full scholarship!!)
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#6
#6
Word has it that the TV show Cops was scheduled to film with the GPD - but the shows producers were told that the streets of Gunsville have gotten too dangerous after the arrival of Urban "Herban" Meyer.
 
#9
#9
ufcover05withothercoaches.jpg
 
#10
#10
nice

hmmmmm, no comment from LG or any other UF fan, now that's interesting. One thing I will say about the Vols, when our players were caught doing something wrong this message board didnt just ignore it. we may have talked it to death, but we didnt stick our heads in the sand and pretend it didnt happen like Florida has.
 
#11
#11
Which one would you like to discuss? People (including me) would get bored if we had to read and write about each one. So pick a couple and let's see what the total facts are.

If, on the other hand, you prefer to simply say that a number of UF's players have character issues in general, I am tempted to agree. I don't like it, but its the way it is these days at all of the major schools given the unfortunate backgrounds of so many of the players.
 
#12
#12
I prefer not to throw rocks on this one. We have had our share of guys in trouble. The only team I will poke at is WVU. RR seems to be developing future inmates at all major NFL cities.
 
#13
#13
Fla. seems to be having a run of bad stories but I also think people are ready to report negative stories due to their recent success.
 
#14
#14
Dawson said:
I prefer not to throw rocks on this one. We have had our share of guys in trouble. The only team I will poke at is WVU. RR seems to be developing future inmates at all major NFL cities.
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yeah, I think they are going to create a "Make It Rain" class worth 3 credits
 
#16
#16
lawgator1 said:
If, on the other hand, you prefer to simply say that a number of UF's players have character issues in general, I am tempted to agree. I don't like it, but its the way it is these days at all of the major schools given the unfortunate backgrounds of so many of the players.
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Interesting wording choice. Almost a built in excuse. It's amazing that all of those Americans languishing through the Great Depression didn't even remotely approach the behavior being shown in NCAA sports programs. I'd say their circumstances were unfortunate. I guess rationalization is just your knee-jerk reaction.
 
#17
#17
BigPapaVol said:
Interesting wording choice. Almost a built in excuse. It's amazing that all of those Americans languishing through the Great Depression didn't even remotely approach the behavior being shown in NCAA sports programs. I'd say their circumstances were unfortunate. I guess rationalization is just your knee-jerk reaction.
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:popcorn:
 
#18
#18
BigPapaVol said:
Interesting wording choice. Almost a built in excuse. It's amazing that all of those Americans languishing through the Great Depression didn't even remotely approach the behavior being shown in NCAA sports programs. I'd say their circumstances were unfortunate. I guess rationalization is just your knee-jerk reaction.
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Actually, no. I was trying to be a-political and non-controversial in referencing the fact that some of these players, who often come from very bad upbringings and poor conditions, would never be college students but for football.

The college game at this level is not interested in the scholar-athlete. They are interested in the athlete, regardless of circumstances. I'm not in any way excusing criminalk behavior. I'm just saying its the way it is right now, and that's true everywhere.

You want to field a team of middle and upper class kids with two-parent homes and no gangs, good grades, etc.? You'll have the team with the highest GPA, sure, but you'll go 0-8 in the SEC every year.
 
#19
#19
lawgator1 said:
Actually, no. I was trying to be a-political and non-controversial in referencing the fact that some of these players, who often come from very bad upbringings and poor conditions, would never be college students but for football.

The college game at this level is not interested in the scholar-athlete. They are interested in the athlete, regardless of circumstances. I'm not in any way excusing criminalk behavior. I'm just saying its the way it is right now, and that's true everywhere.

You want to field a team of middle and upper class kids with two-parent homes and no gangs, good grades, etc.? You'll have the team with the highest GPA, sure, but you'll go 0-8 in the SEC every year.
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Vandy is not 0-8.
 
#20
#20
lawgator1 said:
Actually, no. I was trying to be a-political and non-controversial in referencing the fact that some of these players, who often come from very bad upbringings and poor conditions, would never be college students but for football.

The college game at this level is not interested in the scholar-athlete. They are interested in the athlete, regardless of circumstances. I'm not in any way excusing criminalk behavior. I'm just saying its the way it is right now, and that's true everywhere.

You want to field a team of middle and upper class kids with two-parent homes and no gangs, good grades, etc.? You'll have the team with the highest GPA, sure, but you'll go 0-8 in the SEC every year.
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I never talked about GPAs and upbringing, that's yours. I'm talking about kids with some discipline who actually believe laws are to be followed and coaches willing to let players go who can't seem to abide by the law. It would impact all programs to some degree and would be a positive step for college athletics.
 
#22
#22
BigPapaVol said:
I never talked about GPAs and upbringing, that's yours. I'm talking about kids with some discipline who actually believe laws are to be followed and coaches willing to let players go who can't seem to abide by the law. It would impact all programs to some degree and would be a positive step for college athletics.
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I agree with you, but unless every school would simultaneously and truly change its philosophy on the subject, no one school will.
 
#24
#24
No stones being thrown from my way. The way I see it, we're lucky with everyday that passes in the offseason that we don't appear on the front page. I hate this time of year... as much as I hate the few idiots that "Pacman it up" for the rest of us.

Having said that, "Herben" Meyer is one of the funniest things I've read in a while, even given the unpleasant overall circumstance.
 
#25
#25
lawgator1 said:
I agree with you, but unless every school would simultaneously and truly change its philosophy on the subject, no one school will.
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Fair enough, but this comment is a far cry from the rationalization stuff in your earlier threads.
 
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