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DON'T FART IN BED
This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for many
years. The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting
loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell
would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. Every morning she would plead with him to stop because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to fart this way. Then one Thanksgiving
morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound
asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck,
gizzard, liver, and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her.
She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep
and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband
of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting. This was
followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. hopefully not a repeat sry if it is tell me watchya think
The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in
her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had gotten him back pretty good.
About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his bloodstained
underpants with a look of horror on his face.
She bit her lip as she asked him what the matter was. He said, "Honey, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you."
"What do you mean?" Asked his wife.
"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and
today it finally happened. But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and these
two fingers, I think I got most of them back in!
This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for many
years. The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting
loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell
would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. Every morning she would plead with him to stop because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to fart this way. Then one Thanksgiving
morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound
asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck,
gizzard, liver, and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her.
She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep
and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband
of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting. This was
followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. hopefully not a repeat sry if it is tell me watchya think
The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in
her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had gotten him back pretty good.
About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his bloodstained
underpants with a look of horror on his face.
She bit her lip as she asked him what the matter was. He said, "Honey, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you."
"What do you mean?" Asked his wife.
"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and
today it finally happened. But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and these
two fingers, I think I got most of them back in!
uke: :jawdrop:
