A collection of untold Mike Ekeler stories

#1
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Jul 16, 2018
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#1
I spent awhile calling up people who have known and worked with Mike Ekeler to hear their best stories about the most interesting coach in college football. We heard plenty of them. You can see them all here.

A small sample:

His pet piranha was kidnapped after its untimely death.
In high school, Ekeler purchased a piranha at a local pet store in Nebraska. He named him Carl Lipbalm Spackler, after Bill Murray’s character in “Caddyshack,” a film he can proudly quote verbatim.

“He was awesome, man,” Ekeler said of his beloved Carl. “He was big. He was probably a pound and a half.”

In college, he’d bring friends over to witness its live feedings; it ate about two dozen goldfish a day.

“Carl would corner all the little fish in the tank and then just attack and go to town,” said Laird Veatch, a college teammate who’s now the athletic director at Memphis.

Just before Ekeler’s senior season, while moving apartments, a roommate tried to fish Carl out of his tank with a net, and the fish bit a hole in the net and choked to death.

To honor his pet, Ekeler had it mounted on a plaque, and he hung the taxidermied corpse above his locker.


 
#3

VOLfrombama

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#3
His poop is used as currency in Argentina.

He sweats Gatorade.

He once breast-fed a flamingo back to health.

He sheds his skin once a year.

He once inhaled a seagull.

He's a ten foot tall beastman who showers in vodka and feeds his baby shrimp scampi.
 
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#7
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#7
His poop is used as currency in Argentina.

He sweats Gatorade.

He once breast-fed a flamingo back to health.

He sheds his skin once a year.

He once inhaled a seagull.

He's a ten foot tall beastman who showers in vodka and feeds his baby shrimp scampi.
Brasky once punched a hole in a cow just to see who was coming up the road.
 
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