Official Jon Gruden Thread XXV

['Boro-vol]

Sort of like an Amway Convention :unsure:

Or Scientology.


...Grudenology?

 

[IN Jed]

I live in Indiana (actually DeBord's hometown) and had a coworker ask me today if I was embarrassed to have my mini-UT helmet still on display on my desk. We have become a joke in the world of serious CFB. Watching Florida make moves while we wallow below mediocrity is hard to swallow.

 

[Sstterry]

Haha. I understand beer, but I don't understand Kaldor-Hicks or Paretos.

The key is, drink enough beer and you will understand Kaldor-Hicks and Paretos. :biggrin:

 

[tastycar]

Because Freak won’t make me a Mod. I’ll take care of it.

#SargeforMod #BringDanielaBack

#SargeInCharge

 

[goooooovols]

So nothing hopeful today

Unless Gruden knows our pain and shows up with a Pantone 151 tie on tonight...:crossfingers::crossfingers:

 

[vol445]

Hey no reason to bash him. He didn’t know. This isn’t a discussion thread. ITS ALL GRUDEN!!!!#SOON

 

[mrmax86]

I live in Indiana (actually DeBord's hometown) and had a coworker ask me today if I was embarrassed to have my mini-UT helmet still on display on my desk. We have become a joke in the world of serious CFB. Watching Florida make moves while we wallow below mediocrity is hard to swallow.

I also live in Indiana. Can second this.

 

[Hawkpilot]

That's a weird way to use that phrase, no? I understand that K-H is a state where there are no additional Pareto improvements. Did Peyton change the variables so much that new Pareto improvements were possible?

So that would change the BATNA...in theory? Since you are changing the end result.

 

[smokeyhuntsgators]

I sure am enjoying staying quiet this time, and just reading. Watching.

Hey You!!! What's happening??? Great to see you...:hi:

SOON

 

[VFL1010]

False, I'm an insider on this one.

Bigfoot isn't real....my ass, pal!

Quoted the wrong guy, but you get my point!

 

[tastycar]

You are about as good at humor as you are at the Gruden thread.

This thread really chaps him for some reason. It's weird that Freak won't let him leave. That's the only reason I can figure on why he is still here.

 

[Gtown RNG]

They destroyed history.

Does anyone remember the name of the “one man band” dude that used to play in front of the hotel on the strip? Late 80’s?

 

[Grayvol4life]

Haha. I understand beer, but I don't understand Kaldor-Hicks or Paretos.

Maybe Peytons going to MNF?

 

[Hawkpilot]

mnf?

Interesting. If true

 

[thebjd]

This thread really chaps him for some reason. It's weird that Freak won't let him leave. That's the only reason I can figure on why he is still here.

This is the last happy place on VN. Must keep the house in order

 

[5FingerVolPunch]

Can y'all please stop quoting ToptheTerrible so I don't have to see his posts. Quickest way to shut down a troll is to ignore him. :hi: Responding only makes them troll more.

 

[VinnieVOL]

That's a weird way to use that phrase, no? I understand that K-H is a state where there are no additional Pareto improvements. Did Peyton change the variables so much that new Pareto improvements were possible?

 

[Grand Vol]

The Grude News, evening edition. For those just tuning in.

Brought to you by:

Nick Saban Motors. "I used to be a successful coach; until Gruden forced me into selling used cars...but I've got a deal for you!"

{cue to remove platform Saban is standing on for commercial}

The Waffle House. "Scattered, smothered, covered and chunked. And we ain't talking about our hash browns."

And

Red's Wholesale Brick Distributors. "Want to build something? We can help you brick by brick!"

Apologies for missing the updates. Got a little down, but I got a mix tape from Ape to cheer me up. Now, I've never heard the terms "STFU" and "GTFO" sung to Gregorian chants, but it moved me enough to post the updates again.

Jones was at the press conference today... <sigh> So much for the good news and all.

Beaver suggests calm and things were on track. Which prompted a shaved versus waxed beaver discussion. Which somehow morphed into a Game of Thrones/Dungeons and Dragons/World of Warcraft discussion. Which made it pretty easy to identify the nerds among us. (you know who you are)

Boro suggested the same. Said things were more or less on track.

DTO is gone. Got angry, took his ball and went home.

We have an interesting legal source. Laid out the whole contract thing and how it works. Seems to be very knowledgeable about the situation and broke it down into Barney terms most of us can understand.

As well as another poster that's been following internet stalking us which helped break things down as well. Welcome aboard, guys.

SergeantVol has started a campaign to be a Mod. Not sure that's news, but a little humor mixed in with everything helps the day go by. Oh wait... he was serious? My bad lol

Freak had to step in during Gruden XXIV. Folks were getting a bit grumpy. Hell, I'm grumpy, but I won't direct it at a specific poster.

Albert Haynesworth dropped a Twitter bomb that said Jones will be here the remainder of the season, but Gruden is the front runner to replace him.

Not long after Tweeting, he got beat up by a former cheer teammate of Cindy Gruden for speaking when he shouldn't.

In related news, the NSA has removed the words "Gruden, Grumor and Grude" from it's list of metadata collection. This was done in order to avoid having to hire 7,500 new analysts to sift through message board traffic and prevent the meltdown of their servers.

Freak decides new pool on yacht will be filled with water after Lynchburg levels kept dropping by 2.5 feet every night and 9 feet during game days. After draining, Doyle found nestled at the bottom of the pool with a content smile on his face.

Also, he had to cut Daniela Lopez Osorio as the new head lifeguard. In test trials, attempted male drownings were up 9,432%. Is considering Ryan Gosling and Ryan Reynolds as replacements and calling it R2. Sudden cries erupt of "I'm drowning!" as Volly, Faceless and DynaLo all claim to be in need of rescue at the same time and require mouth to mouth. Sara and SFD heard from the deck yelling "you go girl!" while sipping on little umbrella decorated fruity drinks and hurling dollar bills.

However, new lifeguards note the three are still not even in the pool yet. And that CPR generally does not include silly grins and wandering hands on the part of the victim.

From the entire Volnation News Team, I'm Grand Vol and I'll have a martini. Shaken, not stirred.











(All information herein is specifically parody unless otherwise indicated by real posters or events)

 

[dbarker]

Who is UTs president? Let's all find a way to get ahold of him and tell him not to F*** this up!! We want GRUDEN!!

 

[Coastypop]

I know that Peyton was basically the compensation for at least one Kaldor-Hicks improvement in the deal.

Bubba mentioning the GOAT and the deal in the same sentence .... don't get no better that this :rock:

 

['Boro-vol]

Does anyone remember the name of the “one man band” dude that used to play in front of the hotel on the strip?

No....but I remember him.

How about the Annex....beer bust? One stamp got you into Ivy's and the Annex on Monday nights. $3.00 all you could puke.

 

[Hawkpilot]

Trying to look up KH and make spaghetti..this is my new normal..I have accepted it

 

[TennGentry]

#snowflake

 

[wildorange]

Hey You!!! What's happening??? Great yo see you...:hi:

SOON

Hey there Smokeyhuntsgators! Wildorange wants make sure your percentage is still the same. I remember you from 2012. We got to get it done this time! SOON!!!!!!

 

[VFL1010]

Sorry if already posted. Swain retweeted the gruden odds and said "whew"