Not so smart quotes from the Pros
“I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first.”
- New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers, when asked about the upcoming season.
“I can’t really remember the names of the clubs that we went to.”
- Shaquille O’Neal on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece.
“Mr. Harris has not regained consciousness, and this is cause for concern.”
- J. Snyder, a spokesman at Porter hospital, where Valparaiso center Kenny Harris remains in critical condition a week after he collapsed while lifting weights.
“I would like to extend a hunting trip to him deep in the woods somewhere.”
- Colorado Rockies Todd Helton, on broadcaster Wayne Hagin, who suggested the All-Star first baseman used steroids in the 1990s.
“They are an NBA team, and it is hard to play those teams.”
- Phoenix Suns Head Coach Mike D’Antoni, on the San Antonio Spurs.
“Left hand, right hand, it doesn’t matter. I’m amphibious.”
-Charles Shackleford of the NCSU basketball team
“Any time Detroit scores more than 100 points and holds the other team below 100 points, they almost always win.”
“Sure. I’m proud to be an American.”
-Cincinnati Reds rookie pitcher Steve Foster, asked by a Canadian customs agent if he had anything to declare.
“It’s a partial sellout.”
-Atlanta Braves broadcaster Skip Caray, trying not to say the game has only drawn 6,000 fans.
“I’ve won at every level, except college and pro.”
-Shaquille O’Neal, on his (former) lack of championships.
“Are you any relation to your brother Marv?”
-Basketball player Leon Wood to announcer Steve Albert
“I’m going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.”
-Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh
“I don’t want to shoot my mouth in my foot, but those are games we can win.”
Better teams win more often than the teams that are not so good.”
-Tom Watt, ex-Maple Leaves coach (his team was not so good)
“I quit school in the sixth grade because of pneumonia. Not because I had it, but because I couldn’t spell it.”
-Boxing great Rocky Graziano
“He’s a guy who gets up at six o’clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.”
-Lou Duva, Veteran boxing trainer, on the spartan training regimen of heavyweight Andrew Golota, 1996.
“He’s the man of the hour at this particular moment.”
“You can sum up this sport in two words: You never know.”
-Lou Duva, boxing trainer
“I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father”
“I don’t think anywhere is there a symbiotic relationship between caddie and player like there is in golf.”
-Johnny Miller, TV analyst and pro golfer.
“Then I was skinnier. I hit it better, I putted better, and I could see better. Other than that, everything is the same.”
-PGA Senior Tour player Homero Blancas.
“My handicap is that I don’t have a big enough beer cooler for the back of my golf cart.”
- Pro football linebacker Rick D’Amico, on his golf handicap.